sheddiin tearrs of myy memoriies

DAMN

2009-10-07T22:49:00.001+08:00

DAMN, i cant wait to revive my bloggy pls!):

a long journey

2009-06-19T14:20:00.001+08:00

A long journey;;

i have played soccer for JJ for close to 3 yrs. had been a part of 2 diff teams of diff style. it was such an interesting and fun journey. the most valuable experience, to train to tgt to face other schs' teams during A div. 1 was the only one who belonged in 2 teams. coach said :" long service award" when presenting me the 'cert' that the j1s made for each of us. HAHAs.

but it always wasnt easy for me. i have always have a hard time when both my teams r tgt for any sort of events. i feel out of place althou i shud b feeling the other way s i know, belong and loved both teams. when both teams come tgt, i dunno which team to go to. i seriously dunno how to put all these in words man.

like for the 'testimonial' match, i dint know which team to play for. it felt sucky. like either way im left out. then the dinner aft that was worst. was initially going to eat with the j2s, but when i tot they were going to eat tgt wif the j1s,, i opted out. then was convinced to join the j3s. in the end found out that the j2s and j1s ate seperately. when i knew that, i felt really bad. so aft i finished dinner i went to bid gdbye to the j2s who were in sportslink.

then there was the sakura dinner with coach and the whole j2 team. captain extended the invitation to the j1s and j3s. i felt like sth was amiss or not right. i meant that was supposed to be a team dinner, OUR team dinner. some of the others shared my sentiment!(:

argh,, mayb im selfish or sth. but those were my feelings. thats y im somewhat emo when theres a combine outing or wadsoever. bleah.

and man,, im turning 19 and still stuck in jc. -.-

Yet another ordinary day;;

2009-03-30T22:02:00.002+08:00

Yet another ordinary day;;

Today,, went to sch as usual. well nth interesting. lols. ended sch at 2pm. Mr T is not in sch thus our 'xtra lessons' was called off. went to boonlay shopping centre to see a chinese physician regarding my stupid ankle. this time its my left ankle. pretty much swollen since sun when i sprained it. quite bad since e swelling is quite big. sighs. not being of any help, my right ankle isnt fully recovered. damn. its like numb when i rubbed the skin of e inner side of my right ankle. the kind of feeling u get when u sit too long then get up. this is so upsetting as Adiv is just a wk away. 1st match against SAJC. GOSH!

After my accupuncture[wads e spelling?] 'session' i went to JP. need get a few items. i went to HARRIS and initially wanted to get 'confession of a shopaholic' but ended up purchasing 'angus, thongs and full frontal snogging'. it was a 2 book in 1. another book was behind. it was so diff from e movie. hahas. well,, its aft all an adaptation from the BOOKs. Wonder where i can get 'confession of a shopaholic' original cover. i dont really want the movie cover. and i want the whole series. only read the 1st book : 'confession of a shopaholic' before. borrowed it from the sch's library. hahas. now its a movie. wow.

when i was at HARRIS, some one was talking on the phone to her friend or whoever regarding twilight series' 2nd book 'new moon'. i heard ,"waas,, quite thick lehs." lols. no comments. should not be mean. haha. then i proceed to POPULAR and saw 2 other books aft 'confession of a shopaholic' , 'shopaholic and baby' and 'shopaholic and sister' as well as 'confession of a shopaholic' with e movie cover.

On Sat last wk, aft my tuition i went to JP to catch the movie ' confession of a shopaholic' with my donkey. Saw some soccer guys watching in the same cinema. lols. The movie was quite nice. i feel that Hugh Dancy who played Luke Brandon is quite GOOD LOOKING(in my oppinion)! Reminds me of the actor who acted as Aragon in LOTR. After which, we head to NYNY to have our dinner. Saw Miss Heng and her husband. what coincidence! Then aft dinner i went home.(:

Tanah Merah Chalet

2009-01-09T06:09:00.002+08:00

Soccer Chalet

Im e 1st to blog abt this chalet. my parents dint permit me to attend tis chalet. so i tried my luck at asking permission to at least come down for e bbq night. and i was allowed.

the chalet is at tanah merah. a few of us meet at je mrt platform at 6+ to go tgt. then we took shuttle bus from tanah merah mrt station's area. then e juniors were alr bbq-in. we came then e seniors took over bbq half way thru. then celebrated sharron e hamster's bday. shes e oldest in e junior team. finally 18.(: then ppl slack ard,, watch tv,, use comp,, talk.

then someone suggest to play hotel 626. a horror game whereby u a character who gets stuck in a hotel full of ghosts n hav to escape from e hotel somehow. e graphics were quite real n alot ppl got shocked frm e 1st encounter wif one of e virtual ghosts. then i decided it was not for me n went to watch tv instead. nth much to watch. coach switch to a channel where a movie abt someone whose imagination runs v wild n stuff. i tot i cudnt take tat too. so i turned away then coach switch channel again. soon sharron n coach slpt. then jingwen,, chai,, huiying n yiting went upstairs to play cluedo. aft awhile i went up too. turt came soon aft. i watched em play. n picked e hidden cards. it was fun to noe e ans n c em move their counter ard e board to find e ans. out of 3 rounds,, chai won 1 n yiting won 2. jingwen dint win at all. lol!!XD

aft tat they got bored wif cluedo n went to e staircase landing to play cards. lots of ppl were gambling there. while i stayed in e room wif huiying n turt. they were tryin to catch some slp. i played songs on my mp3. then aft a long while huiying gave up on tryin to fall into deep slp n so she too went out n play cards. i followed soon aft. so many ppl were gambling on 2 mattresses. they were playin in between then play black jack. ending i take over for jaystine when she went to cook cupnoodles wif yiting. then i helped her win bac only 50cents from wher she left. lols. pathetic. sharry won alot. her money practically kept piling up. cai shen ye. lol.

then play finish alot ppl went slp. left some ppl awake. then aft some time i went to clear tings up in e kitchen. so messy n dirty. e left over cake attracted so many freakin ants! then chai n jay helped too. jay mopped e kitchen floor again. me n jay disposed some rubbish into other ppl's bungalow's bins secretly. lols. now im here. so dirty,, sticky,, uncomfortable,, still wearing my contacts,, haven brush teeth all. DAMN! lols.

tml 9+ must check out alr. so early. zzzzz. doubt e rest would wake up at 7am.its close to 630am now alr. n i got to stay over aft i persuaded my mom tat its like dangerous to go home at such a late hr. im hungry alr. shoot!

Im ADDICTED

2008-12-20T14:14:00.000+08:00

Twilight; IM ADDICTED!

it has been a while;;

2008-11-29T23:43:00.000+08:00

It has been awhile;;

woahh,, been such a long time since i last blogged. ive been very lazy. esp if i wan to post up picture posts. cos need to keep arranging e photos. so tedious. den if i use softwares like picassa they take long time to load. so in the end i nv blog. and besides,, posts w/o pictures will be damn dry rights? hahas. will try to blog nxt wk.

nxt wk,, my 1st module for e dua prog will begin. everyday 10am - 5pm. OMG rights? *sighs* wed's friendly match gotta get sacrificed for awhile until my lecture ends.. mon i dunno how i gonna go help darling get rdy for prom. so dreadful. did i made a wrong choice signning up for e dua prog?

ditch e sighings,, imma getting a 13" white macbk. whoopieeeeeeeeeeeee! getting it cos dad renewed e broadband contract to e 10mps 1.((:
shall end here.. gdnight!

xoxo
xiiannwennn(:

hip hip hurray!!!

2008-10-21T21:49:00.000+08:00

Sports Carnival 2oo8

today was sports carnival. o8S2o joined netball.[as mentioned in my prev entry] we got 4th & 12 classes participated. not bad huh! our class quite united 2day.(: our class quite supportive oso. hope tat our class spirit keep improving.. im so tired. lazy type. tml cont!!

what the freaking hell?

2008-10-20T23:59:00.000+08:00

Random-ness

i dont really know how to start. how weird. hahas. its like passed 12 now. so its mrnin alr. damn. im oways slpin so late so its no wonder i m oways constantly having outbreaks. n it sux. i missed my pimple free days. n my darling had matured![u know what im toking abt. *winks*]

aft reading mag in e toilet just now e left side of my back ached like hell. like the kinda feeling u will have on ur neck when u haven slpt properly at night. so screwed,, tml got sports carnival n this happened to me. how lucky eh? tml my fate is determined too. its PROMOTION DAY. sighs. hopefully i will manage to scrap thru pls!

aft sports carnival,i suggest that dolly,, shana,, sharry and i go to rena's hse for a baking session. its been a while since i last bake. its tough for me to bake as i dun hav an oven at home. BOO HOOS! somebody,, GET ME AN OVEN PLS! ;D
ohh,, pretty pls! hahas.

hopefully we will get the time to do so. tml aft e sports carnival,, my class got pw op rehearsal. blahhh. pray that it doesnt end late.. anyways,, my class in taking part in netball. actually we signed up for basketball,, but YOU KNOW WAD? it was cancelled as there were not enough teams signing up to compete. -.-lll

i tink im off to bed now..

dear j2 soccerettes,, i dont know why but i have oways somehow felt left out in a way. u guys sometimes paired up n whenever u guys go out im mostly not 'invited'. i feel a distance..

darling,, you are the best. i have never found better. i love you so much and would like to grey with you!

08S20; yo!

2008-10-18T22:31:00.000+08:00

Learning Journeyy

this wed[15th oct],, o8s2o when for learning journey. and we are e only class goin there. i think its the most cheap skate one among e other learning journeys. our class are just plain unlucky. or maybe e teacher in charge of e learning journey dont like out civics tutor. well,, who knows...

we went to ntu's chinese heritage centre. it was a few stories high. it had a octagon shape interior. ehh,, dunno how to say. look at e pic below.

this is taken from e 1st level

theres a statue of mr tan lark sye[i think i spelt his name wrongly] at e 1st staircase landing.

we were brought into a huge room that is at e 2nd floor. it was an exhibit hall kinda that is partition into many diff sectors. we were given a guided tour by a lady. it took abt 1hr but we did not look at EVERYTHING in that exhibit..

a nice picture of a small part of e exhibit

i was taking a closer look at an aged certificate. i dint even know dolly took a picture of me!

aft walking thru the exhibit, we were led to another room opposite e one we were in. there was this nice and HUGE picture and we took a group photo infront of it aft watching a video in a room that was ultra freezingg. our CT apparently refused to be in the picture even though the guide tried to make him be in it by sayin that his legs were within e camera's focus. well,, upon hearing that he immediately scooted out of e room. its like very what la. he could hav giv some face n just be in it. besides,, it wouldnt kill him wad..

when we got to the end of the learning journey,, we took another grp picture. another lady kindly helped us snap pictures from e 2nd floor while we were standing at e 1st floor. yong meng wasnt in e photo although he went for e learning journey becos as soon as e learning journey ended,, he and mr tan ran off. wonder wads e damn hurry for...

Its scaryy;;

2008-10-03T21:42:00.001+08:00

Its really scary!

that day xx kor told me abt wad happened to Eddy, i dun believe. i tot he was lying. bcox not in my wildest dreams would i dreamt that such a terrible thing would happen. i dint rmb what he told me when i woke up e nxt day. then my mom told me abt some ppl jumping off a building and ask me to read it up in e newspaper. i flipped open home section of straits times pg 2 and saw two ULTRA familiar faces. i was actually stunned. i dint say anything and read what was written in e newspaper. i was really beyond shock e fact tat i sumwad noe em. melody must be super sad and depressed and everyth.

i have not seen em for ages. but theres that weird feeling aft i read e papers. i msged xx kor n told him that i believed him. aft i read tat news i kept thinking abt it.its tragic. ppl who are close to em feel e impact most. there are things that are regretful. their deaths came too sudden. i still rmb that he asked me to add his new email address a few days ago b4 they left this world. but i dint. i wasnt angry,, i was just feeling like i dint need to bcos i alr dunno him. it was a short conversation aft a long while and the LAST. they have left many hurt ppl behind. yf is really sad too. you guys,, take care ya?

and mernel and eddy; R.I.P!

ECP day

2008-09-28T22:34:00.001+08:00

JIA BAO TAN XIAN JI

today i went to ecp wif a few of e j1s soccerettes. well,, its always the few of us. coach cudnt make it as he has service duty if im not wrong..

i went to slp e night b4 at ard 12am. den i msged s.t b4 i slp to meet at je 1st. but nv say wad tym. so my mom woke me up ard 9am. but i only got out of bed at 9.20+am. i look at my fone n saw s.t's msg den she say meet at 9.20am. den i was still at home. so i quickly pack and everyth then left home n head to je mrt station. when i reached i saw jw n st. n den told me kahpoh haven reach. she woke up only aft s.t called her at ard e tym i woke up. in e end i reached b4 her n i lived further. she came soon aft. n jw brought her ball. then when s.t was playin wif e ball she found out tat it is quite soft. jw dint check if it was pumped b4 bringin it out. zzzz. den when i asked s.t 2 hold on 2 e net containin e ball n i kicked, e ball flew out and omost roll to e mrt train track!! den kp reached shortly aft. she was still very tired bcos she was trying to fix her comp till 3am.

so we boarded e nxt train and head for bedok. sharon has reached quite long ago. when we reached bedok int we called her and she came wif a pkt of kopi in her hands. shes was still not sober yet. due to celebratin e win against everton e night b4. den we went to mac n had breakfast. sharon had her own breakfast frm e hawker. then aft that e tiong bahru trio came and had mac meal. but by then it was passed 11am so they were eatin e lunch meals. aft eating we went to take bus 401 to ecp. e bus was sooooooooo diff to wait for. we waited for so long.

aft reaching ecp we saw some ppl playing street soccer in courts like those in e cage/fico. den we went to rent bikes. it was 1hr for 1hr. so we paid for 2hrs wich is equals to renting for 4hrs. kp dint noe how to ride a bike so we decided to teach her. we found a path wich is not those mainstream kind and taught her how. me s.t n jw took turns holding on to e bike n help her learn. it took quite some time,, sweat,, luffter to help her manage e bike. got once,, kp was headin towards e side of a palm tree[i tink] den she lost control and decided to hug e tree trunk wif her left hand n left e bike go. but since e bike is still moving it dropped onto e ground and kp fell too.. i laughed so hard i ROFL while st and jw was oso on e ground laughin. when we tink that kp can manage e bike on her own,, we started our journey to CHANGI! we ride for a total of ard 10k. our butts,, legs and arms ached and hurt badly.lol. kp finally learnt how to ride a bike and managed to ride all e way to changi wif us. tian wei learnt how to ride a bike not long ago and wasnt very stable but still ride all e way to changi too. sharry learnt how to ride e bike a few yrs ago. we all reached changi safe but dirty. esp kp,, she was covered in small cuts and dirt. she fell into bushes. onto mud ground,, into small plants and broke 1. there was once when she fell and then this time her bike got injured with her too. the chain went haywire and jw,, st n i tried to fix it. aft awhile,, a kind soul came over and asked if we needed any help n helped us to 'repair' e bike. he dirtied his hand in e process. we were so grateful to him! our hands were oso dirtied but jw's hands were e most dirty. so black,, covered in oil. we stopped at e sea sports centre to wash our hands n use e toilet. we oso got drinks from a vending machine there. den aft riding for awhile we stopped at somewher and took some pics. den we carried on. it was such a long 'journey'!

when we were reaching e bike rental shop the wind was so strong we omost felt like we were going to get blown away. aft we returned our bikes at e changi's outlet,, it started pouring like mad! we had no choice but to sit at some small eatery place bside e rental shop until e rain ceased. when e rain stopped,, we walked to changi hawker there. it was under renovation so we went to another coffee shop in e same vincity and sze ting,, jing wen & sharron ate 'zhi cha'. de rest of us either consume nth or drank sugar cane juice. i felt e sugar cane juice there was quite nice! aft they finished eating,, we took a bus bac to changi int. on e way we saw e OLD changi hospital n e chalets near it. damn,, they looked really creepy n eerie! i wonder why it is not demolished. or is it not possible to demolish,, i wonderr... ...

aft we reached e int,, we went to e mrt station and prepared to take mrt home. then sze ting realised she dropped her handphone pouch wich contains her ez link card on e bus. so she went to look for it with jing wen while e rest of us waited at e mrt station. everyone else went home except for,, kah poh,, jing wen,, sze ting and I. we went to je. i had my dinner at ljs. aft dinner we went over to mac and sze ting and i ate mc flurry. aft all that eating,, we all went home..

PICTURES!:

sharron&jaystine playing psp aft mac breakfast

sze ting&yuenfong,, on e way to ecp

grp pic

me&sharron on e bus goin to ecp

sharron&I playin psp on e way to ecp

kah poh drinking water beside jw

jaystine dunno looking at wad,, kahpoh still drinking and jw.

hamster on e table,, me looking at fingers and sharry.

sharry jumped away in shock when someone pretended to kick her

jingwen looking at e sea

sharry,, hamster using hp

grp pic

grp pic[wif twists emerging]

dino on stone stool & doggy leaning on kitty on e stone table

acting suicidal[but dun look like]

superwomen returns!

buddism?

presenting e EMO HAMSTER!

emo hamster walking bac

emo hammy

terrorist hamster

terrorist hamster playing psp

sharry&I,, it was so windy while e rain poured

dino eating lollipop,, i was lookin up at e fan.

blur pic of kah poh eating lollipop wif sharry beside.

dark pic of captain&terrorist hamster

walking out of changi beach

doggy tryin to grab kitty

me upfront wif jaystine&jw at e bac

jaystine&jw carrying yuenfong's soccer ball

yuen fong's new soccerball,, we brought 2 balls & dint get e chance to play.):

jw brought a half deflated ball. -.-

me behind szeting wif e rest at e bac.

garfield got caught sticking out her tongue.

jw,, jaystine,, kahpoh&I,, well i dint like posing for e camera then.

look at garfield's expression!

jw,, jaystine,, me,, kahpoh&yuenfong. i was laughing happily.

shy sharry hiding her face behind her hands.

closer up shot

jaystine rumaging thru her bag searching for i dunno wad.

szeting&sharron e hamster on e bus goin changi int.

jw falling aslp i tink. i was playin psp in a comfy position. lols.

we were on e mrt home! sharry wasnt in e pict cox she was behind e camera. hahas.(:

WTH!

2008-09-24T00:44:00.000+08:00

Time is weighing heavily on your mind, today, but try not to worry about the future.

this is what friendster's horoscope thingy said.
ridiculously impossible PLS!

What a nice surprise;;

2008-09-20T00:56:00.000+08:00

What a pleasant SURPRISEE!

what a pleasant surprise it is. one of e postcard i sent is received aft 9days of travelling from Singapore to Finland. i felt warm when i received e email that inform me that e postcard had reached Finland. i cant wait to receive my 1st one. 1 wonder when will it pop up in my letterbox. im going to buy some postcards tml. the other one i sent out seem like it haven reached US yet. i hope it reaches there soon. *grins from ear to ear*

i secretly took up this 'hobby' frm turt without her knowing. hees.
im so happy,, im going to bed now.
GOOD NIGHT!(:

there is no turning back

2008-09-17T22:56:00.001+08:00

There is no turning back..

im as stress all those taking their alvls this yr. its the same fate,, pass or go to poly. theres no more retaining option anymore,, that option is alr used.. im hanging on a thin thread which would break anytime..

it so so damn stresssssss to have good frens in class who are constant gd graders ever since sec sch or at an even earlier state. its like the better they do they worst off u are. it just sux to c how they are performing. im like in a race that i will never even be close to them. im forever behind and not even be able to see their shadow. i dont even think its right to say i belong in the same race with them. its only that we are ultimately heading for the same destination which is easier to reach for em as compared to me. and thats wad makes me feel that maybe i have chose a wrong path not once but twice..

its this two weeks that my pathetic fate would be destined. a blink of an eye and it would so easily pass. im never doing what i need to do..
im dying out... ...

whats wrong with me?

2008-09-17T15:28:00.000+08:00

whats terribly wrong with me?

everyone's talking about aceing and striving for their promos and here I AM praying to just scrap thru to the 2nd yr. i feel incompetent and useless like a piece of crap. OR am i simply going in the wrong direction that my life should take? have i been wasting precious time pursuing sth that is really not for me? Is JC life really for me? man,, this qns are all cramped in my head and making my head spin! i wonder who out there can provide a helping hand..

this is the 2nd shot im trying at the 1st yr of JC. apparently its not doing alot better than last yr though there are minor improvements of cos. if there is totally none i would be better off in the trash can. if i dun manage to get to j2 by end of this yr,, it means that i had to take that ultimate route - POLY education. thinking about all this is driving me nuts..

maybe im really not cut out for all this JC thingy. and besides,, i was hoping to pursue some designing course aft jc if i even manage to get to that stage. but its like ridiculous going to JC to end up going for designing courses as it is known that design courses in uni isnt prestigious compared to other arts sch or poly. however,, what i desperately need is a god damn portfolio which i obviously dont have and dunno how to work towards it..

well... i will leave this entry hanging on a loose thread... ...

this is a beginning to an end...

2008-09-15T01:44:00.001+08:00

Another entry at wee hrs

its alr close to 2am now...

darlin,, if u get to read this,, im sry im still not in bed yet. aft this entry i will tuck myself into bed,, i promise. loves.

haven been bloggin for ages. promos is starting this wk. it sux. someone pls tell me u enjoy exams(so that i can have a jolly gd time bashing u up to relieve stress). as for those FES ppl,, shuddup n get lost for e mean time. see ya,, till nxt yr. sight of u guys make me nauseous[however u spell tat]. i haven been a very bright student and of cos not a very hardworking one. they say you reap wad u sow so obviously im suffering lyk hell now. gonna suffocate but i tink i will manage to scrap thru to j2 wif some luck. honing my basics is my prep for e promos now. theres a lack of time,, i cudnt do anyth but work towards a pass. arghhhh,, talking abt all this makes me feel so frustrated n all. CHANGE TOPIC!

the upcoming prom aft my batch's A's is pathetic. heard tat only 50tables were booked and like 20 tables were signed up by j2s. j1 leaders were welcomed to go too. HUH? makes no sense.. you might tink tat mayb e venue is sucky or maybe e organisers were crappy or wadeva. but in fact,, the venue is actually at SHANGRI LA HOTEL(orchard),, which i personally went there twice due to e fortune of having a wealthy distant relative,, a cousin of my dad's.

side track abit.. the 1st time i went there is bcos my dad's cousin's son was having his wedding dinner there. i went wif my parents & relatives. the 2nd time was bcos my dad's cousin was helping his mom celebrate her birthday there. i cant rmb her age(opps!). he even invited e liu ling ling,, e 881&12 lotus actress to host e celebration. normally tis kind of occasion guests wwere expected to give red pkts s gifts but my dad's cousin did not xcept any. so kind. my parents were on holiday in thailand though so i went wif my relatives..

i dont know y many of e j2s are not attending prom. its kinda weird. for me,, i feel tat wifout prom its like not a complete graduation[i emphasize tat this is solely my personal pt of view!]. but if my frens r not going nxt yr,, obviously i will not be going. who the hell m i suppose to sit wif! prom is like e only occasion for everyone to dress up prim n proper. not forgetting the memorable photos to take and stuffs. its also a good excuse to splurge.(; but if u want to save,, just d-i-y alot of e things ppl go to salons n nail palours for. this yr's theme: HOLLYWOOD GLAMOUR! should i go for this yr's prom? *ponders and get to nowhere*

shall post up pics of my 1 yr anni dinner wif my darling. its quite some time ago alr. hahas. we had our dinner at citylink's nyny. we were seated at a tiny 2 seater table. not very at ease but i dun see any other available seats sooo no choice.. ): theres this seats that can seat ard 6ppl and is individually back to back with other tables so u wouldnt be seeing any strangers when having ur meal. but we did not had e luxury to sit in those.

so we were handed e menu,

the coverpageone of the pages of e menu which i like due to the COLOUR

then we ordered our food and waited for it to be served. meanwhile... ...

i decided to take some photos.

look at my darling's lips. he was saying sth when i snap a pict of our cups of ice water. [twin towers?]

pictures of e restaurant itself[cannot take pict of e seats cos i wud need to aim e camera at the ppl who are eating there]
left: pict of e nice seats i liked

the fork&knife on the serviette

right: side view of my darling; center: mah darling looking at sth; right: a nice front shot of my darling(:

and then the drink i ordered was served. it was some choc milkshake.. darling didnt order any.

the milkshake with my darling's hand(s) in the background(:

and we took turns tasting the milkshake..

left: me trying the milkshake; left: mah darling tryin the milkshake

(he said it was too swt but i like it!)

aft that the food came! yummyyyyyyy..

left: my giant meetball pasta[so much darling had to help me eat]; center: my baked muscles, i mean mussels; left: our aft dinner candy floss[it was big&fluffy and we cudnt finish it]
dint get to snap any photos of darling's food. i forgot what he ordered. =X

aft the sumptous meal,, i could hardly walk at all. i swear my tummy was sticking out. hahas. we wandered ard for awhile b4 going home.(:

what i wore that day(:

This is the end of this post. hope u enjoyed e picts.(:

xoxo

xianwen

stupid SUNDAY!

2008-07-13T16:43:00.001+08:00

Nike+ Human Race 10K

2008-07-13T03:46:00.000+08:00

Nike+ Human Race 10k

heys,, anyone interested to participate in e Nike+ Human Race 10k? its this coming 31st AUG,, a SUN. registration fees for e race is $25. you will get a cool personalised shirt as everyone hav their own shirt wif their own number. there is oso a free goodie bag. this race is for a gd cause. its in e name of CHARITY.(:
soccerettes interested to go,, msg me. we can go tgt!!

okay,, e summarised details:
-31st AUG,, Sun
-$25 to sign up for race
-free shirt
-free goodie bag
-prizes to be won[nike vouchers]
-2 categories[U25 or Open cat.]
-can participate in grp[25ppl]
-can oso participate as sch.

more specific details,, go to http://www.nikeplus.com/

18th milestone

2008-07-13T02:56:00.000+08:00

18TH MILESTONE

on 26th JUNE,, it was my birthday. my 18th one. it was quite diff from my 17th one. last yr i had mor ppl sendin me birthday wishes thru SMS. this yr it was much lesser. and frm diff ppl. my old frens had forgotten my bday too. they dint even wish me on frenster when frenster has bday reminder!! i had less than 15ppl wishing me on frenster comment page[saddenin!]. wich was really pathetic. take a look at last yr's one n COMPARE!): so anyways,, e overall ppl wishin me tis yr is fallin short frm last yr's one by quite a fair bit. last yr i had more than 100ppl this yr its only a little more than 80.

e junior soccerettes gav me an early present. e team bag was e present n it came wif a card too. thx!!(:

DARLING was e 1st to giv me a present b4 my 1st lesson.(:

but on a happier note,, i had ppl celebratin my birthday in school for me. not 1 celebration,, not 2,, BUT THREEEEE!(: i had 3 bday cakes in a day&all frm e same cake shop!! lol.e 1st one was rather early in e day. 9+am. my 1st break of e day. my classmates were acting fishy so apparently i suspected someth. but i appear as thou i dunno anith at all. n 2days b4 my bday my classmates brought a card lyk piece of cardboard n some other tings to sch n i asked y dey bring to sch den they giv reasons lyk "nth...",, "for some tings..". so i tot it was obvious tat its got sumth to do wif my bday. hah!n obviously my predictions were spot on.

shana asked me to go to concourse n find e rest of our classmates when i asked where were sharry n rena. so i knew.. but i jux nonchanantly walked to e concourse wif her. upon reachin,, i saw tat all my FEMALE classmates were gathered ard a table waiting for us. so i walked there n put down my bag n prepare for e song&cake.(: they sang me a bday song n i made a wish n blew out e candles. shana only manage to take 2 individual photos. oso dunno y we dint take a photo all tgt. weirddd~ so aft i cut e cake n took e candles out i scoop a little cream wif my index finger n wipe e cream onto jianyun. she wanted revenge n chased me frm e concourse to ard squash court there then she gave up but for safety reasons i dint turn to check whether she was still on my trail i jux ran all e way to e pe porch toilet. i was holdin e cake knife all e way frm concourse to e toilet at e pe porch. lol. then when i returned to e concourse,, sharry was e dirtiest among us all[quite smelly too!xd]. then she left soem cream on my arm n i washed it away while she went to e toilet to clean herself up. meanwhile,, i cut e cake n everyone had a slice.(: e cake was quite nice. thank you GIRLS!((: then shana,, sharry&rena gave me myy "PRESENT". it was wrapped in many layers of newspaper. so i cheated and tear through e layers a few layers by a few layers instead of one by one. n i found sth i saw a few days ago wif a slip of paper inside wich reads "happy 18th birthday. its e tot tat counts.(:". then we went to class.

in class jalaine msged me ask me wad tymm i got break she wanna go kick ball wif me. i knew it was not tat she really wanna kick ball wif me. but i dint noe exactly wad was it. so i played along n told her my break tym. den turt oso msged me n asked me wad tym my break was n say it was bcos all of us needed to discuss abt our passing down ceremony. was alittle fishy so i asked her wad is there to discuss abt e ceremony. [someth liddat,, cant rmb e exact words] then during tat break of mine,, me n classmates were sittin ard not doin anith. e j3s came bac n were givin out roses[till now i dunno wads it all abt]. then suddenly,, i heard e bday song n it was e soccerettes!! my classmates slipped away n said tat gav them tym to really prepare my REAL present. lol. then they sang finished e song n then one j3 gave me a rose n a few other j3s were there too wif roses. they looked lyk they wanted to giv e roses to e soccerettes but they were too engrossed in e celebration n so e j3s went off to other parts of e canteen. then i made wishes n e 3rd 1 was "i hope all of us cud belong in an outside club tgt." then i blew out e candles n chop,, i meant cut e cake in 14 slices. but not everyone ate e cake. [anyways,, i saw e price of e cake last wk. hahas.] the team present was a tennis sleveless top frm adidas. then there were e grp presents. a pair of nike shinguards[black&gold],, an orange size 3 soccer ball n a developed photo wif a msg bhind. some of them rushed off to lessons n stuffs. n then only yt&hy were left. i was tryin so hard to finish e cake as i dun wan 2 bring it to class,, in e end left a little n threw it away.

b4 i had my lessons i walked ard e canteen[i cant rmb for wad] n ran into andy who passed me n adidas paperbag wich contains a size 5 soccer ball[red&black] n a white waterbottle. it was a present frm OG21. thx guys! althou no celebration frm u all.[bias lehs,, kyson got i dun hav.):] gadis n kong wished me happy bday too.(: so by then i had quite alot of tings alr. i had my hands full when i went to class.

aft sku me n sharry went to e canteen den i saw e junior soccerettes crowdin ard a table den i knew tat they bought me a cake. i reached e table even b4 dey lighted up all e candles. lol. den they sang bday song n den i made wishes n blew out e candles. by then i was alr quite sick of cakes s i alr had quite alot of cake for tat day. so i jux ate a choc ball frm e cake aft cuttin it for em to eat. aft eatin we went to e field n play soccer.

den halfway,, i went to canteen s darlin wannted to giv me my FOURTH cake. it was a lovely tiny choc cake. so swt of him. love him to bits! e cake was frm bakeinz[not sure of e spellin]. quite expensive for a cake of tat size.. althou he dint tell me wads e cost i knew it didnt come cheap. then darlin left for home s he needed to study.

n i was to meet my parents for dinner a jp's crystal jade. as it was still early,, i went to imm wif turt,,jingw,,yt,,?chai?[not sure]. cos jw wanted to buy a top frm adidas she saw e other day. in e end dun hav her size so she dint buy&yt left halfway. turt&jw wanted to eat so we went to eat.. i dint eat of cos. then i was running late as i was too engrossed in tokin to turt&jw. den i was lyk running all e way wif all e presents[still got my bag,, so heavy!!]. end up reached jp close to 8pm n went to queue for crystal jade.

aft eating crystal jade,, it was alr quite late so my parents & I took bu home. we reached home soon aft 9pm. i asked my dad for a psp but he say its lyk an inappropriate tym to buy. blahblahblah. so im gonna ask him buy me at e end of tis yr[if possible!].(:

i took pics of e presents. shall post it up when i hav e tym. its alr 15mins to 4am in e mrnin. im so dead! mom is soooo sooooooooo gonna slaughter me. X=

its all beginning to fade;;

2008-06-12T21:07:00.002+08:00

its all beginning to fade;;

e chalet is over alr. so fast. i actually feel weird bac at home. when we were at e chalet it really felt lyk wad huiying wished for on her 18th birthday. it was as thou we were living under one roof. we had fun and laughters through e few days. laze ard e first day and bbq-ed for 2 nights. i had more fun bbq-in than cooking. hahas. it was hot and sweaty but i enjoyed it. and as usual we would talk to coach abt alot of tings. watched euro matches wif chai n tzer at mac.

nxt day i tink ppl start waking up frm as early as 7[or even earlier,, i cant rmb]to as late as 10+ i tink. coach alr rode e bicycle tat yiting rented to buy lasi lemak for us[breakfast]. in the aftnoon we wanted to bowl so we headed to e hub mall but we need to book e lanes b4 hand in order to play and there were no lanes for us to book when we were there. so we decided to go 2 e arcade wher we can play more tings too. we started off wif e table football[dunno e name for it]. some of them were screamin lyk hell. i played a little too. not very good at it. chai's a pro at it man! then i played e bball 1 wif jas n we found out we were playin e kids one[no wonder so short la!]. aft tat jas found e norm one and i went to team wif her. i played so many tyms my arms ache alittle tat day. i teamed wif chai 3 tyms,, jas 2 tyms[e norm size one]. highest score was 561,, achieved it wif chai as teammate. hahas. some were playin daytona then. terri was screamin while she drove. hahas. everyone was havin a great tym. aft playin i wanted to get a drink n end up everyone was buyin food. i bought a choc waffle frm prima deli n it cost $1.60!! and i swear e choc spread e auntie gave me was Superrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr little. ask turt if u dun believe.. aft leavin e mall we walked bac to e chalet there. on e way there we walked passed a couple of guys who were livin a few doors away frm us[we dint noe then] and yiting heard one of em say "bung bung bung bung" continuously. tat angered her and she turned n gav em n angry stare. some of us wanted to cycle while e rest dint want to so we split up. those who want to cycle rented bikes n went cyclin. the rest decided to play soccer. we went bac chalet to find jing&lixuan. they were eating!! asked coach if he wanna come along n play soccer wif us he said he felt feverish and wud join us if he can. turt&some other ppl[i tink is chai n bren] went to e little shop within e coasta sand pasir ris chalets' premises to buy panadol for coach. aft tat we left to find a place to play soccer. i went to check out e 'grass field near our chalets and then we changed in2 our shoes and start playin. there were alot of dragonflies flyin ard in e area but nvtheless we played there. so we hav chai n yiting as goalkeepers and start to split e rest in2 2 teams. so bren say "red shirts one team,, blue shirts one team" but it was unfair bcos xcept turt,, everyone else there were wearin blue. so bren said "white shorts one team,, black shorts one team" but again its unfair cos turt was wearin white shorts n e rest were in black shorts! so i said "those wearin specs one team,, nv wear one one team",, turt was wearin contacts den e rest of us was wearin specs. so actually we were doin it on purpose to disturb turt. nxt bren said "okok,, those tie ponytail one team,, those nv one team" turt was e only one tying ponytail one. hahas. she was super odd one out in so many ways. finally me,,turt n chai r in one team n yiting,, lixuan,,bren n tzer were in e other. odd no.s so liddat lo. aft some tym those cyclin cycled passed us n stopped to join us. suddenly there were alot of ppl. so we had to split them in2 e 2 teams. so bbss ppl[turt,,jing,,me] wif chai,,elaine n huiying then css[tzer,,lixuan,,bren,,jas] ppl wif yiting n terri. there were alot of ball flyin straight in2 ppl's faces. bren kicked e ball right in2 my face n she was jux lyk 2 steps away frm me. hurts lyk mad,, my face had or-bak-ku! hahas. elaine slipped wif a 'whoopps'. chai's shoes all wet n her knee gort mud. lixuan slipped but managed to land on one knee[i wonder how she did it!]. everyone was dirty. huiying rolled on e ground n got bac up on her feet aft 2 rolls continuously. then elaine had to leav so we ended e game n every1 headed bac to e chalet. den washed up by e poolside. coach went to find us but we reached bac b4 he found us. den we bbq-ed again. hahas. at night watched euros wif everyone. half tym some left for e chalet to slp. ending of e match some left again. finally it was down to me,, turt,, chai,,jas and coach. when we returned to e chalet aft e match ended wif portugal winning e match wif e score of 3-1,, only chris n bren were awake. then chris,,chai,,jas n coach started playin mahjong.

well,, i dunno how to play so i dint. turt&bren dint play either. turt played wif tzer's psp den bren was bored n became 'waitress'. serving drinks n snacks to e ppl playin mj & oso helpin them to cook cupnoodles. then i watched e tv for awhile. some oldies sg tv drama was on,, i watched awhile n went to slp. quite exhausted. dose hu said dey wanted to head bac to chalet n slp 1st so as to be prepared to play mj when we returned were soundly aslp. n i heard e nxt day tat last nite when dey came down to play dose playin alr ended e game n went to slp. terri left on e 2nd nite too.

finally it was e last mrnin n we need to check out soon. nobody noes e tym we need to check out. everyone woke up n was still pretty tired. jingw dey all bought mr bean's round pancakes n soybean. not enough for everyone. n oso not every1 wannted 2 eat. me n turt wanted mac breakfast so we decided to walk all e way to mac to buy. so we asked e rest if dey wan mac breakfast too. we took orders n went to buy. came bac wif e mac breakfasts n everyone started eating n watchin tv. we ended up checkin out late. i tink ard 12 n actually we were supposed to check out at 10+. so needed to buy xtra money but i tink someone settled tat. den we carried our huge bags n headed for e busstop to wait for bus to go bac to pasir ris int. we looked lyk we were runnin away frm home. on e bus we were tryin to finish e drinks. dere were ard 2-3[i tink]bottles of 1.5l drinks. we even used cups to drink. was still drinkin when we were in e mrt. slowly ppl start alightin at various mrt stations. i was one of e last to alight tgt wif hy&lixuan at bl mrt station. then we took diff buses at e int to go home.

well,, i cant rmb wad i did when i reached home. its lyk last mth's ting alr. thx 2 e virus in my comp i cud hardly access my blog acct practically everyday. was jux tryin my luck jux now[2am+,, 13july] n i managed to login. so i finally get to complete tis pathetic entry tat shud be finished last mth.((:

get up,, and chase the visions

2008-06-09T22:54:00.000+08:00

today had training,, it was alrite. very little ppl turned up and its oways diff ppl each training. tsk tsk. hope when sch starts e juniors will come more regularly. kah hwee obviously dint noe i retain cos he asked me y i was at training. he came to training today at 8am+,, close to 9am i tink. didnt look at e clock then. he was in his usual banana suit. hahas. ohh,, and he had a new hairstyle. it looked quite funny to me. coach said it was okay.

tml is e long awaited chalet. hahas. coach coming wif us too AND he has kindly paid for alot of tings! so nice rights? hahas. we gonna watch euro cup matches tgt at mac whenever possible i guess. i tink its going to be a crazy and FUN chalet.(:

im gonna lugg darling's laptop there in case im bored. relly need take good care of it. i have packed alr. my bag is all puffy! hope im not bringing too much. oh well i wun be able to beat theresa rites? hahas. *winks*

mymymy,,

2008-06-04T22:40:00.000+08:00

its tiring to be a student. so draining so frustrating and stuffs. its constantly making me at e tip of e cliff not being able to take it. its really difficult considering e fact that I dint acheive gd Olvls grades. mine were among e bottom we manage to SQUEESSEEEEEE into an avg JC. everyday i dread studying,, picking up notes and attempting to do tutorials are making me all moodless and tired. but i guess i have no choice. aft all,, they always say 'you r not the only one going through all these'. but how r u comparing all the ppl wif diff abilities all tgt? lifes just unfair,, nobody said it isnt rights? hahs. whatever~

e paragraph above just looked like an introduction of a GP essay. LOLS!

shall talk abt today. woke up at 650am n rushed to sch for SOCCER training. so elated to go. was just on time. super 'just on time',, dunno wads happening i haven been early for any of e trainings yet. so unlike me.): hurriedly changed and everyone got rdy to warm up. kah poh led e warm up today. sze ting constantly stiffed laughter throughout e warm up la.

today's weather was fine for training unlike ytd wich had a heavy downpour! we were all drenched frm head to toe. today was rather hot actually,, tink i got burnt again. sharry's legs got visible lines of wher her socks reached up to. hahas. so half way during training we were doing 1 on 1 snatching e ball to score n i was paired up wif jingwen. i was ahead of her dribbling the ball towards the goalpost n she was bhind chasing AND THEN she stepped on my right boot with SO MUCH FORCE e bac of my boot came off n my inner socks got pushed off at e heel n e outer one got pushed off slightly and one of her studs dug into my skin! and den bcos she stepped on my boot,, she losdt balence and fell down wich in e process she pushed me forward so i ended up sliding on e field wich gav me abrasions. i oways get them. that time during adiv match against tj oso. e f***ing girl[#3] out of NO REASON pushed me frm e bac n caused me to fall n scrap me knee. n she kept using vulgarities on me. like wad is her prob pls. opps, im sooooooooo digressing. hahas.

so i sat aside n rest for real long cos it was really painful. my left knee swell due to e wound n of cos e part wher her stud dug into my skin swell too. aft a long rest i got bac to training. couldnt do voley[how do u spell tat?] s when i tilt my ankle downwards 1 part of my boot would dig into my alr hurting wound jw inflicted on me. ): coach asked me to do wif my left leg instead. it was really difficult.. then e rest had a little physical and i joined e later part of it. den alil of other tings den training ended. e j1s were tired but they said they werent cos they tot if they say they are tired they would get scolded by coach. wich i find funny. lyk y would coach scold us if we admitted we were tired? we had 2 consecutive days of training and coach is not unreasonable..

aft training some of us went for phy lect wich was 2.5hrs long! it was a torture. i had to endure so hard not to fall aslp. towards e ending i rested alil. aft tat went to mac wif szeting&kailing to eat. they had lunch but i jux ate a doublecheese burger cos i was eating wif darling later on. they then went to lingdi's hse[she haven shift hse since pri sch days(:] to play majong. jas n jw went too. then i went to spc and bought famous amos cookies for donkey s i had him waiting,, but i bet he dint mind cos he could slp summore. i bought sportade n deodorant too. den went to his hse he showered n changed den we went to cosway by bus 187. den aft i collected my fone we went to pastamania for late late lunch. aft wich i pms n ill treated my darling. n i went home n her went to derrick's hse for majong!! bad bad donkey.

iloveyou FAT DONKEY!

first day of holidayy

2008-05-24T22:48:00.000+08:00

time just flies while i was blinking my eye!

2008-05-17T01:43:00.000+08:00

its so darn late now. close to 2am. should be in bed soon after i reached home frm e movie at jp wif my darlin donkey. but here im idling away using e net 2 view ppl's blog etc. my parents are comin bac frm deir 'expeditions' in thailand soon. time REALLY flies!had donkey over last fri nite till sun evenin. then mon till wed i had to stay home alone n slp ALONE at night. it was quite frightenin,, not quite a nice experience.

thurs wich was ytd,, i attended e dumb n short n borin BANNISTER camp for j1s. it commence at 5pm n ended tis mrnin at mrnin assbly. so damn lame rites? we dint do much either. we gathered in lt5,, den got changed for wetgames. wetgames was within e NETBALL COURT. lyk wth. n e 'schedule' for stations was screwed up. tings went haywire n we played a few. all were lame. i tink e games were e worst ever i tat i experienced in JJ. aft games we went 2 wash up. my classmates n I dashed in2 e pe porch toilet n queue for shower stalls while i helped em grab our showerin stuffs we left in e shelves at pe porch. dere were 3 classes assigned to shower in e toilet pe porch so we knew we had to dash n fight for toilets else we might end up not gettin a chance to shower. after showerin we had dinner,, dinner was rather alright. considered quite nice camp food alr![sharry dont complain! :D] aft dinner was songsingin in lt5. a rather short 1. followed by 2 episodes of oprah winfrey's[correct spellin? =/] talkshow or rather interview.. e 2nd 1 was really impactful. if i type e details here i tink my fingers might jux giv way n stop movin. hahas. aft tat was short tym wif ct. -.- den it was bedtime by 12am. so tired! darlin donkey was stayin over in sch.

i slpt frm 12 till ard 545am but i still feel tired. but i can last even when im tired,, tats y im still able to be here jabbin away at e keyboard. had some sort of meeting wif mslim wich lasted damn long, way beyond wad i expected. damn it. agreed to play soccer wif e guys but mslim drag&drag&DRAG. end up left donkey,ernest,nevin,winston,kinon. den we went 2 play. kok yao joined in soon aft we started wif another guy whom i dunno.

aft playing soccer i was alittle more tired. we went to westmall for lunch by bus. as usual we talked & stuffs. saw a big pic of MAXIM mag front cover wif my sec sch fren in it.[turtle told us about it a day or 2 b4 i saw it] went to foodcourt,, i felt like having bk so i went down to pkt it upstairs to eat. owe elaine $5 to get my lunch. apparently i dint bring cash for camp. was rushing tat time tats y. aft lunch talk again den it was 5+ 6 alr! was so shocking to hear of e time from turt. darlin was slpin at home all e way. was worried abt the fact that my hp batt was flat even b4 sportmeet ended. when i rmb i need to call my cousin to inform him whether i was going over to his hse for dinner at 430pm,, i realised my hp was as gd as a spoilt 1. keep tryin to make myself borrow hp frm any of e girls but couldnt,, dunno y. so it dragged n end up dint call at all. went home i chiong go inside my room to charge my dead fone. hurriedly ring up my cousin & ask if he got my dinner for me. he say no so i told him i wasnt goin over tonight. aft wich i rang up darlin donkey,, he was slpin till i called him. ask him still wanna catch a movie he ask me check e showtimes. aft checkin i told him we go watch e 920 slot den i went n hit e showers alr. went to jp 1st to grab e tickets aft showerin as darlin need to wait for his mom to come home wif his dinner. end up he left home wifout dinner as his mom wasnt home yet n if he wait any longer he wont b able to make it for e movie. we were goin to watch 'made of honour'. had nachos & ice lemon tea. tink its gonna be my dinner since im lyk so tired&lazy to cook cupnoodles n eat even thou its jux pourin hot water in2 e cup. feel very lethagic..[dunno how 2 spell] ate a little of my B&J's strawberry cheesecake,, my all time fav flavour. DELICIOUS! aft wich i pretty much rot in front of e comp.

managed to:
- water e plants outside[cousin 4got to help me water them ytd when i was in sch 4 camp,, so screwed. im afraid tat they will die b4 my parents come home]
-burn incense stick & pray lyk wad i did for e past few days.
-clear e toilet in e kitchen of a basin wif alot of mosquitoes' offspring.[so stunned when i saw wad was in e basin of water. hurriedly pour away e water.]
-found a spoon unwashed in e sink since wed night[used it to spread peanut butter on my bread n dint hav time to wash it den i went off 2 camp alr.]
SERIOUSLY,, its not easy to live alone!

n i haven wash my clothes! damn..

issit my fault instead?

2008-01-26T23:16:00.000+08:00

m i bein to possessive? i jux wan him wif me omost oways.. m i lyk not givin him his own space or sumth? sighs,, i dunno. dun really noe wad to blog. feelin just as moodless. he said he had reupload e pics,, but he dint. n i lyk keep meddlin wif his finances. maybe im just too much. maybe im just makin myself irritatin. but i noe tat no matter wad happens i will nv 4get to love him. i hope e same goes for him...

wad a dream;;

2007-12-20T17:13:00.000+08:00

darlin,, u r away on holiday. missin u so much. u're njoyin now arnt u? come bac must study hard alr okays? iloveyou! been pickin up a lil studyin while u r away. still,, everyday is quite borin. had trainins on mon&wed. wed's trainin was cut short cos de soccer guys claimed dey booked e field 4 deir frenli match against j2s. how come i dun c park&zac&some other ppl? 1oam+ trainin ended alr. went 2 eat lunch wif e girls. aft wich 1 of em wanted 2 head 2 e book fair so de rest of us went too. it was held at suntec city conventional hall. as usual. went in look look c c. spent quite some tym dere. end up only a few of us bought quite a number of books. as fer me i bought e horoscope bk. 2o% off. so cost 2.4o. went home to slp aft tat.

today is a public holiday,, nvtheless it was even more borin. stayed home all de way. ytd nite mom still say gonna go bk fest&shoppin aft tat wif me. den rained in de mrnin so de plan was called off. borin~ missin donkey!!!!~

dat day had a dream&it was a bad 1 to me. X= cant rmb wich day was it&i cudnt rmb much dtails abt it too. all i cud rmb was tat donkey's dad scolded me. dunno wad was de cause of it. he said sumth lyk i wasnt fit to b donkey's gf. woke up feelin bad&worried. onli rmbin it again 1 day later but dtails were 4gotten. oh well...

iim piglett!(:

2007-12-14T21:39:00.000+08:00

i lyk tis font colour. no wonder i oways blog wif it uh? hahas. today is friday. mrnin woke up msged darlin askin if hes comin over. den he wasnt. he was still slpin. he said hes tired. so i went bac 2 slp. inbetwin gort msg oso. den woke up at 12pm finally. wash up,, on com&tv. den mom called&asked if i helped her to bring out the clothes. i dint&told her cos she dint asked me to. den she say need her to tell me to bring out den i bring out 1? aft hangin up,, i made my bed&brought out the clothes. mom called&told me she is goin 2 buy a pkt of mixed veg rice den we share fer lunch. i den told her i dun feel lyk eatin mixed veg rice so she bought laksa 4 me instead. halfway thru my lunch my mom went downstairs to hav lunch wif her fren. so i ate lunch&went 2 shower. aft showerin,, i hurried out to meet darlin...

we went to raffles shoppin centre. he wanted 2 buy a new wallet frm river island. so i helped pick out 1 of em. it cost 53 bucks. lyk quite ex,, cos it was a plain black 1. nvtheless darlin bought it&we went to basement to buy a drink. i was thristy since i boarded the mrt.. i craved fer bubbletea so we went to buy 1. aft wich we bought calamari rings frm chippy[or was it clippy?] british __. argh,, cant rmb the name. ate finished den i sent darlin to work. it was drizzlin so i knew i wun b able to send him far as he wun allow me to. so aft we part,, i went bac 2 tanjong pagar mrt station. i went in2 cheers 2 c if i wud lyk anith to eat. bought a small pkt of chipps. ate finish den i took mrt bac to jp. went 2 giodano 2 find a scarf. cudnt find it. i rmbed seein a pic of giodano clothes wich included a scarf on URBAN of straits times. maeb it wasnt frm giodano&dey jux had the model wear it to match the clothes. oh well,, den i proceeded to winter time. wanna check out the scarfs dere. look here&dere n finally dcided on a striped 1. brown,, white&black stripes of diff thickness. while payin i saw lipgloss. so i went down to watsons aft payin to buy. cos it shud b cheaper.. so i made my way down to basement where watsons is. i wanted 2 get e grape 1 fer darlin buy grape 1 was sold out in watsons. so i tot maybe guardian wud hav stock fer e grape 1. sadly dey only had the mandrin 1. so i tot i wud jux go winter time&buy it fer a higher price.. i went dere&c,, it cost the same as it is in watsons. xcept fer e strawberry 1. i wonder y... den i took the grape 1&paid. it was the last piece. winter time has 11% off all items. so end up,, it was cheaper dan in watsons. hahas. havin bought everyth i nid 2 buy,, i tot i wud lyk to hav a piece of cake. i went to coffee bean&dint felt lyk havin any 1 of em. den i went to maccafe & looked at the oreo cheesecake. dint felt lyk eatin it either. so i went home buyin no cake. lol. saved a few bucks.(: reached home mom say she dint cook dinner fer me as she tot i wun b home fer dinner. i wrote a piece of note sayin i will b home b4 7. she saw it as 1o. so she dint cook my share of rice. so i ate cupnoodles. aft dinner watched tv&now bloggin. tml i wanna go play street soccer but i scared parents dun allow me 2. zz

tears r all im left with..?

2007-10-24T22:06:00.000+08:00

tears r all im left with..? parents dun understand me. im weak inside. dey jux adds on de damage to de weak n fragile spirit within me. im so lousy in deir eyes. im nth. im worthless. dey might b better off if i werent born in de 1st place. dey oways say me tis n tat.. wud i not b who im today if not fer em. as in my negative ways. maeb i shud b elimated frm tis world. im jus useless n givin ppl trouble. my father oways say i dun appreciate tings. n say when i get married his 'mission' is accomplished. he isnt bothered abt wad goes on in betwin. den if i go poly n dun wish to study further den i shud go work den get married off. as if im deir burden n it wud be so much better if im out of deir way. i shud jux get lost. so i wud b such a hinderin 'burden' to their bliss. dey oways say till dey understand me. blah blah. wad do dey noe? ani1 can xplain? say my attitude gort prob. den even if i study 1 subj oso no use. since a long tym i noe wher im wrong den hopin to get a 2nd chance. well seems lyk i wun get it. dey say i dun dserve it. den so be it. sumtyms isnt it easier to say den doin it. ya im hopeless i guess. tears kept flowin lyk de river.. nth seem to gettin in2 me. tings r oblivious to me. im bein absorbed in2 my own world. a world wher i will seal myself in2 n maeb 1 day i will find myself in another world. tings r gettin out of hands. let me disappear frm tis world... it wud definitely be better fer em. my so called parents eh? arnt dey suppose to support me all de way. rather dan givin up. dey tink i cant make it den jux give up on me. keep pushin me to poly. dey tink i shud relly go poly. my attitude not dere,, my brain not relly gd. yaya. nth is gd abt me den. i shud jux go pluto. den ask me go get sum job lyk wad clark. wad high class clark. etc. im worthless eh? dey say dey are tired abt my studies. givin up alr. everyth.. dey shud jux kill me off,, wun it b better? den dey can njoy dey life alr. go overseas. take deir minds off me. im a disgrace to em. im jux a piece of crap dat dey nv desire...

4th mth,, woots;;

2007-10-16T22:07:00.000+08:00

tuudae is our 4th mth. so happy. donkey gav me a simple gift. i haven buy him his. dat mthly tingy came ytd nite. so screwed. hate it. it of no gd in any posssible ways. irritatin. tml gort trainin. its gotta get in de way. damn. n whenever it comes it jux makes my mood swing curve go hay wire. cried in sku. made a fuss out of nth. boohoos. SO SRY DONKEY! donkey i love you. dun wanna lose u. everrr. every nite i go to slp wishin u were nxt tuu me in bed. its so cold & lonely here on my bed alone at night. it gets worst when i slp alone at night. kinda scared of de dark nowadays. oso dunno y. so weird.

tuudae aft everyth in sku i went home wif donkey. den ran to bus stop frm sku bcos it was pourin. den half way gort 1 man walkin in de oppo direction approach us. den he came in between us n we were runnin den. de tip of de umbrella scrapped my scalp. hurts lyk mad. n it was 2 tips wich was not relly sharp but its de impact. we were runnin den. donkey didnt get a bad impact. i did. was cryin aft bein scrapped until we were on board de bus. emotion wasnt stable since lessons in sku ended tuudae. so a little issue wud jux trigger de emotions in me wich lead me tuu cry.

so bored now. nid to write de OP speech. zz. dun feel lyk doin. i got 4 slides. lyk alot to cover. veri tired. althou jux now gort go fer a short nap. mentally tired. X= den tml still nid go copy notes of chem & tutorial. sighhs. tink i retainin alr. gort tis feelin. hopin fer de best. i promise 2 work xtra hard if im able to promote. if cant i oso dunno parents will approve of me retainin anot. dey mite ask me go poly instead. wich i dun wan. sighs. guess i end here. dunno wad to tok abt alr.

iloveyou;;

2007-07-25T23:19:00.000+08:00

haven felt right ytd. but im fine now alr. tink the common test inchin closer is makin me feel tat way. its lyk weighin down on me within me realising. guess when stress comes im owaes unable 2 feel it. its lyk workin within me secretly n makin me break down without knowin y. it has owaes been liddat. /=

tuudae went 2 sku as usual, called him in de mrnin. he was late fer sku n bsides hes got 2 help me print my bloody eom. den aft assmbly i went under pd blk 2 find him. he passed me de marble cakes we got frm breadtok ytd evenin. den aft dat we sat down 2 c wad parts of my eom he is to help me edit. den aft tat i quikly rush off to class. 1st period gp, ms P. went in she saed all dose hu still haven done deir txt analysis 1 can leav de class ytd again. ytd alr liddat. nvm so we went 2 the canteen n attempt 2 do sum hwk. left the txt analysis undone althou ms P told us 2 finish our work within tat 1hr of 'free period'. we tot do alr oso no use cannot go bac class so leavin it till tml. den 5mins b4 gp lesson end vivien msged us n told us we nid hand in de txt analysis by 9am. X= was so screwed. all of us panicked. arghhs.

met him in de canteen cos got de "free period" den accpy him eat den aft tat "free period" he went library help me edit my eom n his own. den i went 4 maths lessons. aft maths lessons we met up outside my maths classrom. 216. den aft tat is break n den chem lect. aft chem lect i hav chi. he walk me to my classroom. 2o9. so swt. i love him alot. pls let no1 n nth take him away frm ME. hes mine. no1 shall lay a finger on him. lol. as in if euu wanna tak him away. if nt den nvm. xd aft chi is break 1/2 hr den pw at 1pm but mr sin went 2 sum museum. pw tchers nid go 1. den we free all de way till 3pm. nid mit fer learnin journey. so at 1pm i packed up n left fer home. wan 2 slp. cannot take it alr. n wanna put bag. so heavy. wan my life. hmmms. aft tat went home slpt till 2.2opm. roughly 4omins or so. so short but nvm gort slp can alr. at least i wun feel so so so tired. he called 2 wake me up n tell me got ppl gatherin fer learnin journey alr n asked me issit i gort de wrong tymin. den i jux woke up veri blur so i sae dun tink so will call frenx 2 confirm. in de end i dint. cos when i totally woke up i rmb clearly relay msg was sent down 2 mit at 3pm n dat james told me b4 i left 4 home tat another class goin learnin journey b4 my class so its em gatherin not my class.

so i pack n left home, shut de door n saw my mom comin home. told her i goin fer learnin journey etc. reached downstairs i realised i left my ezlink card at home n asked my mom help me bring it down. aft tat i went 2 flag cab 2 sku. reached sku alr still early. haven 3pm. saw de leaders' investiture. looks kinda lame. zz. met him up n hes goin home. ask him go home slp. we mitin again later aft my learnin journey. love him. den 3pm we went fer learnin journey at NUS. go de raffles ... museum. lol. quite interestin. not bad. until 5+ den we did sum tuupid stuffs. sumwad stalk ms loon. god damn farnie.

aft the expedition aft our learnin journey all of us took bus home. 1st we took 963 2 de nxt bus stop 2 take 198. de 1st bus stop no 198. den aft tat i alighted at je lib dat bus stop. called him n he saes hes reachin n asked me wait at de bus stop. i crossed de over head bridge n walked 2 de bus stop. jux nice i reached de bus stop his bus arrived n he alight. was delighted 2 c him. was afraid he was angry cos when i end learnin journey i called him n tell him i end alr den he sae he go shower n stuffs. den aft tat i wasted alot of tym wif my classmates in NUS. den kip makin him wait at home. felt so bad. sry darlin. /=

when he reached i saw he wasnt angry wif me i was relieveed. love him too much pls. den we went 2 je ent. ate dinner at ljs den went 2 take neoprints again. cos i wan. sry eeyore. den aft tat late alr so go home lo. he sent me hm as usual. den aft tat we cudnt bare 2 leav each other when de lift hovered at 15th floor. my hse ma. den aft a long while den we parted. he went home n i too went home. den stepped in2 de hse mom sae go downstairs collect contacts. i rang her up earlier 2 ask if she helped me collect alr den she haven n sae wait fer me come bac den go collect tgt. den went down collect alr come home n blah blah blah. love him.

` xoxo
I LOVE JEVON!<3

so afraid n tired;;

2007-07-24T23:54:00.000+08:00

feelin veri down since 1o+ i tink. tear-ed on n off. dunno y i feel tis way. dunno wads wrong wif me. ): told him i was upset. he asked me y but i dint noe y either. jux no reason felt down n relly upset. partly shud b bcos i miss him too much. frm 11+ till 12am i cried non stop. cryin lyk mad fer no reason. wads wrong wif me? i myself do not noe. deres lyk sumth stuck in me. i cried it out alr but it doesnt seem 2 make me feel better. de feelin jux keep coming bac. tuu some sense its relly irritatin as i dun wan 2 feel dat way but i cant help it. neither do i noe y i cant help it. its takin serious control over me. goin bonkers. n tis feelin has gort nth 2 do wif him. nth at all. hopes he trust that wad i say.[tat its got nth 2 do wif him] he looks relly tired. hes slpin in front of de webby cam alr. im not gonna wake him up. wanna let him slp. althou he insist he wans 2 accpy me n i noe he wun b able to hold out when he sae he definitely will. noe hes tired. nv blame him n arnt angry wif him fer fallin aslp. i kept insistin dat he shud go slp while he insist on stayin up 2 accpy me. in actual fact i dint wan him 2 go slp. i wan him to company me. sudden feelin of loneliness is fillin me. tat i dunno y too. so each tym i ask him 2 go slp i will breakdown.even now as in typin tis im tearin. wonderin issit gonna be tat tym of de mth again soon cos recentli im feelin really moody n stuffs. or perhaps its de commontest weighin down heavily on my without my knowledge. studyin is relly gettin tiresome. althou i haven rellly studied since jan. as in de sku work n stuffs r wad im referrin to. his webby cam is still on n so i can c him slpin. i broke down yet again. unknown reasons. wonderin whether i shud wake him up n ask him go slp or let him slp wher he is.. still feelin really sad. nid 2 go get choc soon. to cheer myself up. seriously...

leave me NOT;;

2007-07-20T00:46:00.000+08:00

dun ever leav me pls. im equally afraid n scared. feel so tiny,, weak,, vulnerable. ya. study study study. sighs. dreadful. seriously so. post tis fer u. (: b4 i go slp. yawns. hahax. i noe im tired. but so r u. i dun wanna go sku tml. sighs. love euu much! nv wan 2 leav euu. nv wan euu 2 leav me. for tis i prayy..

myy passionn ferr the ONLY eiiu;;

2007-07-19T22:55:00.000+08:00

18Julyo7;
wednesday went to sku myself. he cudnt wake up n he wasnt feeli well. was worried. isnt angry or sad he dint cum fetch me 2 sku. i noe he is tired. wed a short day cox its cca dae. howeva my cca has seized till common test is over. so its an early day fer me. in the aftnoon at 4.3opm de soccer guys gort a so called ttm match. wasnt official thou. so darlin sent me home aft sku. den aft tat ard 4 de tym he went bac sku cos of de ttm match. den i went home changed n put bag den go bac 2 sku. went to watch de match wif theresa lee. she left half way n i cont watchin alone at de grandstand. saw hong shuqi. watched darlin plae. wasnt bored cos watchin the match. saw him sittin at de side cos he wasnt playin initially. but later on he was sent in 2 plae. was happy fer him. he tot he wun get 2 plae i tink. was elated he plaed. find tat he plaed well. not veri sure cos im a noob at soccer. ahahas. XDD aft the match he sent me home den he went home too. was late fer home by a little while n dint get scolded or wadeva sort. was happy i can wait fer him but he felt guilty dat i wait fer him alone. i dun mind. relly..

19Julyo7;
tuudae mrnin he came to fetch me to sku. was so glad to c him in the mrnin thou i was feelin real tired. tink hes tired too n bsides hes gotta wake up much earlier dan me jux 2 cum all de way 2 my hse here. sumtyms i feel so guilty too,, hes got 2 travel de xtra mile n wake much earlier so as 2 b able 2 fetch me 2 sku. feel so so so touched n loved. i swear no1 showered me wif so much love b4. as in in a relationship dat is. love him so much too! went 2 sku n met him up every common break we had. miss him every sec i dun c him. missing him even when i c him on webcam in msn now. cos hes lyk so far away n im seein him thru device. not live. aft sku tuudae was relly tired. we went jp 2 eat lunch,, dcided 2 go pizhut. dint tok much. i was too worn out. sry darlin. ): aft tat he sent me home. loves.

so sad,, tink i wun b in tym 2 get rdy de stuffs fer his burfdae. gonna feeel real bad. thx 2 de DUMB commontest. skus feelin mor n mor sarky. i onli love seein him in sku,, playinn n last but not leastt CCA. haaaas. de rest can go die. damn! condemned life. arghhhhh! de world is ever spinnin. deres no tym fer me 2 catch up. tis makes me feel lyk givin up all tgt. [referrin 2 sku work.] sighs. kinda dpressin. so upsettin my parents n others dunno how hard it is 2 catch up when either my basics r 4gotten or i simply dun hav a foundation dere. lyk chem. im lyk so goner fer it la. sighs. uni lyk so far n unreachable alr. tym i jux too little. if only i can freeze tym. IF ONLY...

sumtyms alot of stuffs feel so sarky. but its lyk part n parcel of sku life. so yucky. grr.
ankle still haven recover. still pain. sighs. lyk cant recover. stamina lyk shit alr n i haven done my napfa. die. no1 left. i run myself sure veri slow 1. cos no competition. die die die. heck care alr. napfa no gold den no gold lo. oso used 2 it alr. owaes de sit n reach pull me down. hate it.
guess im endin here..

Last note: I LOVE JEVON! <3

`xoxo
darlin eeyore,, jlhl. hahas.((:
passion fer jevon. xd

nv leav me n i will nv leav euu too;;

2007-07-16T22:30:00.000+08:00

tuudae went 2 sku wif a lethargic feelin within me. felt reluctant to leav hse fer sku tuudae. dunno y. MON BLUES to de core man! /= ponned yoga. so lame. waste my tym. im super UN-flexible laa. NAPFA test i will owaes flunk de bloody sit n reach. arghhhs. lotsa other ppl frm my class ponned too. he release at 3.3opm cox he dun hav pw tutorial. we sat ard n did nth much. aft tat we went field n plae ball awhile. den went 2 watch de guys plae at bball court. it was 4.2opm we dcided 2 leav when de guys shift to another bball court cox ppl r usin the flyin fox in sku. so de guys cleared de area n he bid ernest gdbye. den we went to get our bags n went 2 my locker 2 put stuffs den left by de front gate. went 2 catch a bus to jp. we mitin jasmine mummy n de rest at jp 2 watch 5pm tym slot fer harry potter latest movie. de movie was quite nice. superb effects n it was relly classic. movie ended ard 7.3opm. kinda late. the rest left jp aft watchin de movie. we went 2 buy comb. my old 1 'died' in his washin machine. hahax. it got chopped up cox it was in his pants pocket. left it dere de other dae we went out. went home wifout it as i fergot to take it bac. hahax. den aft tat we took 192 to my hse. send me home as usual. den aft alightin de bus he saed euu wanna go to pioneer mall n so we went. he refused 2 sae his purpose of wantin 2 go. brought me 2 bengawan solo n wan 2 buy cake fer me. it was a belated burfdae cake cum 1st mth anni cake. so swt of him. LOVES! aft wich i went home n he went home too. tuudae is our 1st mth anni. loveyoueeyore!

` xoxo
nv endiqq lurvee;;

m yy love fer y ou will nv f ade;;

2007-07-15T13:24:00.000+08:00

this few days went to sku n sum mrnin met up wif him n go sku. in short he fetch me to sku. lovehimsomuch.

Thurs; 12july
thurs my period came. hate it. no wonder feelin emotional lately. n all dose stomachaches. had free period bcox econs tcher dint came n made up fer de lesson on tues 5pm. right b4 de free period was sum lesson. cudnt rmb wad. den aft lesson i went 2 canteen wif my classmates den i saw him so i rang him up. durin wich my clasmates dcided to go to the classroom wich we will hav our phy lesson wich is aft our econs lesson. so i dint go cos wanted 2 c him so i call him n waited fer him to pick up de call. he dint. tink his fone gort prob or ssumth. waited fer sum tym n finally he pick up de call n came 2 find me. told him i havin free period now n he look kinda grumpy. he asked y wasnt i will my class so i saed dey went up 2 de classroom to wait fer de nxt period. den he lyk dun wan to c me n ask me go to class. felt so unwanted n bein pushed away by him. tears filled my eyes. den dey fell. i felt so hurt i told him i was goin 2 the classroom n willl msg him later. i left him dere n went up de stairs. tears kept fallin. went into de class n sat down. i laid on de table facin down n sobbed. aft awhile i received his call n i dint wan 2 pick up. i dint feel lyk tokin 2 him at all. i rejected his many calls. he sent a msg sayin he wan 2 c me. i replied wif onli de classroom im at. dint say anith else. picked myself up n went 2 de wash room 2 clean up. den i stepped out of de wash room n saw him dere. i told him i was goin 2 take earli leave. he apologised profusely. aft wich i msged ms loon sayin i gort bad cramps n wanted 2 go home early. so she asked me to mit her at de GO[general office]. he went wif me. he saed he wanted 2 skip lessons n send me home. so we left sku tgt. we were fine by den. tok bus 2 int n den took bus home. on de bus i teared again. partly bcos of my period. it will make me veri emotional. wich sarks. ): den aft dat i went home shower n went out. accpy him go home shower den acppy him go work too. sent him 2 his work place. oppo fullerton hotel. den aft wich i took mrt bac home. reached home at 6+. den all is as per normal. nth much 2 blog.

Fri; 13july
fri eend sku at 3.3opm. he ended at 12.3opm. den had practical make up at 1pm-2pm. den aft sku we sat ard at tables under pd blk. he gort trainin at 4.3opm. i dun hav anith xcept dat soccer gurls playin soccer against bball gurls at 4.3opm. den aft ta at 4.3opm he went fer trainin n i went 2 plae. gort said 2 b violent again. den as usual im tot too b veri hot headed bcos of de amt of strength n force i used. budden deres no link fer me. not bcos of anger or wadeva dat im violent. i plae ball everytym liddat 1 wad. /= aft playin it was ard 6+ den went 2 plae wif kenny n park fer a while till de guys ended trainin. den saw jasmine mummy;ah yi dey all den asked em goin wher. dey say goin 2 eat dinner at jp. den i wanna go. asked him go too. den we go eat dinnner at jp. took a great deal of tym 2 dcide wad to eat. jasmine mummy;huili ah yi;michelle biao jie n japanese went 2 eat. we tag along. at kfc. den aft eatin veri late alr. every1 went home. den as usual he sent me home den go home. was late alr. i dint got scolded by parents thou...

Sat; 14july
ytd went to sku in mrnin fer gp vid session. he saed he wanna cum fetch me to sku. n he oso hav chem tutorial at de same tym, 8am. but he dint, he cudnt wake up. its okaes. dun blame him. he must b relly tired. so was i. den i went sku by myself. reached sku alittle early. den we were supposed 2 wait in canteen fer de gp rep, VIVIEN TAY, to go ask ms P wad classrm we usin. den gp rep late. nvm. she reached lyk 15mins late or mor. den we rot in de canteen. when she reached she went 2 de staffrm 2 find ms P n ms P wasnt in sku. so gp rep rang ms P up n ms P was at home. wad the hell. so no vid session. ms P saes vivien nv giv her de list to hu is attendin de session. so we dun hav any vid session. waste my tym. woke up so early n made me so tired. so rubbish. aft tat we filmed de racial vid fer sum dumb competition held by de sku fer j1 classes. so filmed finished i waited fer him cox he competitin in de DOTA comp held by EG club in sku. his fren, marcus, asked him to play her his team n so he plaed 1 round n beat de opponent n went on to de 2nd round. den 2nd round start i went home 2 shower n stuff. meanwhile gort ppl playin soccer in sku. ex-ctssian against dunno hu. fergot. den when i reached home i rest awhile wanna go shower alr he sae he finished his comp. gort booted out. den i sae i haven shower so in de end he wait in sku fer me. den i took bus to the bus stop outside sku n he boarded de bus. he went home shower i wait at de blk oppo. aft tat we took bus 2 de je int n took mrt to town. plan 2 watch harry potter. when at de je mrt platform i saw khine n kevin. aft tat saw jingyi n she told me she saw turtle,darryl dey all. so i msged turtle ask her issit on train. dey wer goin 2 citylink. when reached town we saw px dey all so farnie laa. px,derrick n ernest. he went 2 bang px frm de bac den px was relly angry cos he tot hu did dat. so damn farnie. den when he turn ard saw him den luff. so farnie i was luffin at de bac. den aft tat we went seperate way. we went cine tink dey went 2 taka. not sure. aft goin cine we realised all tym slots r fully booked. so we dint catch any movie. had lotsa tym. i wanted 2 go heeren so we went n window shopped. den halway i felt i had gastric so we went 2 eat dinner. dcided i wanna eat at swensen so we went dere. i ordered my usual; chicken baked rice. he ordered fish & chips. we ordered drinks too. he had iced cuppocino[dunno how 2 spell] n i had apple juice. my order wasnt up to standard. de rice wasnt veri cooked. so de order was canceled frm de bill. dint order anith. in de end order fish & chips too. lol. b4 tat swensen gav me a complementary soup to make up fer de "LOST". lol. den it was lyk freezin cold. tink we were seated under de aircon or sumth. so cold i shivered a little. when i was 3/4 thru my meal i swap seats wif him. my seat dere was colder. den aft eatin we left. went taka. walk n walk. i window shopped alittle. den aft tat i wan my ice cream badly. we went centrepoint's haagen daz. yums! so nice lo. den we ordered a drink n a 3 scoop ice cream of our own choice. own recipe. strawberry cheesecake; mango sorbet n berries sumth i cant rmb de name. de drink was called pink beauty. had 2 raspberry on de top. tink gort 3 small scoops of de berries sumth ice cream wif a even smaller scoop of strawberry/cherry sorbet on de top of all. den drink n ate n drink n ate den tok tok tok. as usual i tok alot. bleahx. xd den cannot finish de ice cream. so wasted. felt so sad. was gd ice cream. but was so bloated i cant eat animor. shudnt hav ordered so much. ): den we paid n left, de place was closin too. was late alr. den aft tat we went 2 tak mrt. he sent me home as usual too. den aft tat i reached home ard 1o+ den he went home too. onlined awhile roughli 3omins den i go slp alr...

Sun; 15 july
toodae woke up at 12pm by my mom's call. she was at aunty lily hse. called 2 wake me up n ask me wad i wan fer lunch. den she gonna go pkt fer me. i onli managed 2 drag myself off my bed at 12.3opm. went 2 wash up n onlined. he ask me issit i jux woke up. he msged me i dint reply cos i dint c. tink he msged me while i was washin up so dint c. aft tat i straight away online n dint go get my fone wich was on my bed den. aft tat i apologised n went 2 get my fone n made my bed. mom came home close to 2pm wif my lunch. ate my lunch n stayed online till now. dun hav much to blog cox i stayin home de whole dae. den my mom gonna go visit my grandma at my cousin's hse now. hes comin over to my hse soon..

euu r my everyth;;

2007-07-10T22:57:00.000+08:00

ytd nite suddenli miss him lyk mad. dunno y. had tis urge 2 wan c him. saw him thru his webcam. however tat wasnt enuff. its lyk so near yet so far. i cud c him however hes far far away frm me. was havin a bad flu den. used super alot of tissue.[so many trees i killed; HE sae 1.] den aft sum tym i went 2 visit kai yan's blog. her blog song nice. sound sad n veri soothin. den listen fer sum tym den made me sad. summor missing him seriously alot. den i teared. ok,, sounds so dumb n silly. cant xplain y tat happened. n i tot abt if 1 dae he leav me,, den mor sad. tears kept flowin. so hard 2 stop. so emo ytd nite. dunno y. felt so tiny n afraid dat he had leav me bhind 1 dae. de tot is jux 2 unbearable. dun even nid tink abt it happenin. tink it will kill me. change me. etc. mite hav alot of effects.

my mind is constantly on him. den aft tearin fer quite a long tym i felt better. stop cryin. crapped wif him. made him luff. loves 2 c him smile/luff. so cute. love him so much. de feelins r so deep it reaches all de way down in2 my hart. its rooted rite dere in my hart. let nth brings us apart nor let anith take him away from me. i wud b torn if tat happens. every sec i dun c him i miss him. serious syndrome named I-MISS-JEVON.

hes so swt,, nice n everyth i wud ever wan. i wan 2 feel his presence rite here bside me now.but its impossible. onli can c him in sku tml mrnin. love him alot. seriousli ALOT! whenever its nite tym i seem 2 miss him a whole lot mor. at least in de dae i can c him in sku durin breaks or common lects.

tuudae had long dae in sku. we planned 2 get early leave n leav sku fer else wher. in de end dint. cox my ct strict wun grant me early leav easily. sighs. nvm. sat tgt fer pw lect. aft lect i went fer chem xtra tutorial n he went fer pc. aft dat i hav econs make up lect. asked him 2 accpy me go fer lect n he went. so nice. lyk so waste tym 2 him lo. diff tutor.. we sat at de bac i dint listen de lect was a little late n dint noe wher she was n wasnt in tune fer ECONS. so i switched off n jux njoy his company.(:

aft lect 6pm alr. so late. called mom n arranged 2 mit at 6.35pm at 4oo+ dere de bus stop. we left sku aft i hang up de fone call wif my mom. den we went 2 take bus at de bus stop jux outside sku. boarded 99. onli lyk 3 stops. so damn near. soon we alighted. sat at de bus stop wif him n waited fer my mom 2 arrive. kinda long. we were early n my mom was a little late. soon she reached. saw me n him at de bus stop. i took my stuffs n stood up den walked 2wards my mom. my mom nodded her head at him n smiled. tink he did de same,, i dint turn n look. den i saed bye again n walked off wif my mom. msged him soon aft. lyk DUH~ den go de clinic 2 consult de doc on my sprained ankle. been swollen since 13 june.

gonna b a mth soon. so fast. dumb ankle,, make me cant train. cant finish up my damn NAPFA. sighs. stamina is lyk constantli declinin. so sad. durin trainins all i can do is stand ard n watch. n basicaly rot. den ms lim sae we shud look out fer mistakes n learn frm em. oso 2 watch de good kicks done by other team mates n learn em 2. lyk so zz. got 1 trainin i sat at pe porch watch till nearly fell aslp lo. /= ou-ohhh. shhhhh.

durin de consultation i was on fone wif him. den aft tat i asked him lent me shoebag n slippers. den oso can c him. den he bring 2 de clinic fer me. so swt. love him to bits! love of my life.. den my mom complained. sae y trouble him,, shud fone my dad n ask him bring den he oso can fetch me home so i had reach home earlier. blah n stuffs... fergot alr. den aft bring de stuffs he took bus home again. den went 2 eat dinner wif my mom at de coffeeshop at 4oo+ dere near de bus stop 1. den aft dinner headed home. took 185. so long lo de journey. my mom still sae 185 faster dan 99. /= den reached home it was alr close 2 1opm. so late la. den i charged my fone. fone batt flat. den on comp a while den went shower. finished showerin it was alr 1o.3opm. den on comp n everyth as usual. yaa. no nid sae mor.

cant wait 2 c him in sku tml. wanna c him now. i wanna hug him. miss him lots. alot alot alot lo. ): but cant. hadda wait till tml mrnin. shall end here.

``xoxo
xiianwenn*(:

tis innocence is brillant

2007-05-30T22:40:00.000+08:00

here r tuudae's pics:

tuudae woke up at 1oam. went 2 shower n prepare 2 go mit cca mates. scheduled to mit at 11am at je int. was late of cox. hahax. opppps. sowie babes. X=

den aft tat mie turt jw n chailing took 197 2 queensway. had lunch dere. den met up wif yiting aft lunch. walk ard 2 search fer a team socks. we nided 2 buy 2 pairs. so we ended up buyin at de top floor. a red diadora socks. den met up wif huiying n her fren. fergot her name wors. ou-oh. //= den we called up de other gurls 2 c if dey mind dat we buy a 2nd pair of socks wich cost 15 bucks. adidas black 1. den dey dint mind. sum uncontactable. X= den we went 2 de shop wher i bot my boots n shinguards n buy de socks. all of de socks i pay $$. nets. walaos. 3oo+ lehhx!!!! ): den i bot a adidas soccer ball. $3o. *grins* black n white. same model as turt's 1. onli diff colour.

aft we gort everyth we nided,, we took 197 to SMU tuu hand in de street soccer match's participation forms. while walkin 2 SMU frm de bus stop,, jing wen n chai ling took a pic by another bus stop. de bacgrd lyk dey on holidae liddat. veri farnie. [jw forced cl 2 tak wif her,, ahaas!]2 teams frm jj signed up. cox we gort 15 gurls in de cca maa. den split lo. 7-8. de match is held by SMU at jalan besar stadium. de guys' match is on 8june. gurls' 1 on 23 june. cum support mie!! lols. XDD den gort 2 goodie bags. 1 per team. inside gort guo dong. de in ribena kind of packagin. grape 1. quite nice. den gort massage coupons 2. lols. massage fer arms n shoulders. aft settling everyth dere we dcided 2 go bugis junction.(:

so,, we WALK dere. walk lehhx. so hot lo. sweatin lyk mad. den dey insist on walkin. its not VERI far. neither issit 5mins walk kind of dist luhh. ): was wearin jeans n shirt laa. hot hot hot!! lols. XDD

den we at last reach bugis junction le. i walked in n saed:" waaaaas. i feel as thou i reached heaven. woohooo~" hahax. so shuang luh. we went basement fer finger food. cl bot ice cream frm uzumaki. den sum of us bot tako balls. woots. yummy lehhx. den sum of us oso bot old chang kee. yummmmmys. kekes. had laksa at queensway earlier on. den hungry liaos ma. de laksa so little. small small bowl cost 3bucks. ex nehhx. budden nice.(: den we shop ard. window shoppin. den jw bot a denim iskirt at dunno wad shop. de shop name gort 'ppl' gort 'asia' de. 4got de name le. haaas. 21 bucks onli. quite cheap. cox clearance sale or movin sale. yapps. den b4 dat i saw kenneth wif his gf. he slim down so much i cudd hardly recognise him lo. /= den waved hie. den aft jw gort her skirt,, mie n turt was lookin ard in outfitter gurls. nice shop. lurve deir tshirts. de words on sum of em r so cute n true. gonna go dere soon. hehes. den huiying n fren wanted 2 go 'the edge'. sadly it closed. gonna b rennovated in2 food court. dunno y. so sad lehhx,, no mor 'the edge'. it was doin well. dint noe y its gonna b transform in2 a food court. as if bugis junction not enuff food places. 1st lvl n basement so mani alr lo. -.- den huiying go buy sunblk at watson. den we spent sum tym in dere. quite long. turt went 2 test de mascara lo. so farnie. 1st tym i c ppl try la. lols. den sat outside de watson den we took sum pics. den huiying de sunblk gort free gift. 1 box wich contains a smaller bottle of sun blk. lols. de box look lyk condom lo. den huiying's fren tot is condom. den turt open de box den its jux sunblk. den we all initialli tot ish condom lo. if euu get 2 c de box i bet euu had agree wif us! haaas. den we headed off 2 take neoprints. wahhahas. [X we took pics in 2 diff machines. onli gort pics frm de 2nd machine in comp thou. den tak finish we go tak mrt go bac west side. lols. XDD

huiying n fren go home. de rest go je. jingwen wanna eat. as usual. de fereva hungry gurl. lols. XDD

shhhhhh! i nv sae anith hors! ahahas. its a fact kaes? den we go je ent. i saw huili ah yi sendin her fren 2 traffic lite den she tok 2 mi awhile jiu go bac je find jasmine mummy dey all. den went in2 je saw jas mummy n xiao wei n shirlyn or dunno hu i fergort!! /= den she sae she goin c her ahma. den i c huili ah yi cumin out frm toilet n goin up escalator. go find ahma n jiujiu. den we all walk out of ljs cox wanna go hawker eat. den saw idham n his gf. den in the end walk bac in2 je ent. cox jw wan air conditioned place 2 eat. complain v hot. when she wearin sleeveless n jeans wich is folded up 2 her knee luhh. -.- den we go in eat jap food lo. den de rest ate 2. while dey ate i went 2 walk ard je area. went 2 de shop wich sells bakery stuffs den went 2 ntuc. searchin fer stuffs mahhx. den i go bac je ent 2 find em cox dey eat finish le. den jw went home. cox she later goin hospital 2 visit jing wen. lols. jing wen visit jing wen. another jing wen of cox. if not she visit herself mehhx? -.- den de rest send her 2 bus stop n pei her wait fer bus 66. den we walk 2 library. turt wanna borrow bks. den aft tat dey pei me go de bakery equipments shop 2 buy stuffs. den aft tat chai ling went take bus. yiting went find fren. den me n turt go tak mrt home. den i reached home at ard 8 liddat lo. yarpps.(:

why not take a crazzy chance,, y not do a crazie dance.

2007-05-01T13:27:00.000+08:00

tuudae is labour dae. HOLIDAE. but,, im STUCK at home wif nth 2 do xcept rottin. *sighs* so sad. dad is workin thus im home wif mom. holidae nv go out. omg. stunnin! hahax. im lyk so DARN boreddd. arggggggggg.

tuudae obviousli wudnt hav muchh 2 blog abt. So,, i shall tok abt ytd's happenin. (:

ytd it was sku as usual. had lots of lame stuffs happenin thruout de dae. lols. veri usual 1. bcox my claz gort jokers lyk nevin,, zhi hao,, bryan. lols. of cox i had join in de fun. hahax. lyk the tings dat happened in art room. lols. friggin farnie. everydae go sku oso kinda interestin n entertainin. elwin was absent frm sku ytd.

den gort 3 jyians attach to our claz until 1pm. it was an attachment fer em to c hows jc life lyk. dey were sec 5s. same age as us. hahax. den 1pm gt phy lecture test,, de jyians were brought tuu lt3 den we went off to lt5 4 our test. *dreadful* de test wasnt veri smooth fer mie. well,, none of the tests of ALL SUBJS were smooth goin fer mie since 1st 3mths. failed all. xcept chi test. hahax. *hmmms,, shudnt b luffin* X= aft handin in de test i was kinda relieved as other clazmates seem tuu hav much MORE blanks. *gags* [oppps,, so evil. X=]

aft phy lect test was maths tutorial. trugged myself to cla 1o7. damn. no mood. gort bac de test wich we submitted last wk cox mr lee wanted 2 record de marks. [tml got maths retest,, budden not counted,, SO lame] i gort o/15. dunno he wan record wad. /= my WORST test EVER. im lyk so god damn doomed. sighs. den mr lee went tru sum assignment qns so i felt friggin bored. n started 2 draw on de table. i OWAES doodle on sku tables. vandalisim. wahahas. [dun tell on mie!] den jowell was sittin bside mie n he saw my drawin. den he sae veri nice. ask mie tak pic of it n send him. den i try takin pic budden gort lite reflection cannot c de drawin. so i sae y not i draw on paper fer him. den he fumbled fer his foolscap pad den he ask mie draw on de bac of de pad. the card board part. i started to draw my usual goth font of his name. den he sae veri nice. denn show fang yong. lols. den aft tat i drew de drawin i drew on de table. end up de table 1 nicer. budden de 1 on de foolscap pad oso not bad laa. hahax. self praise. opppps. X= den jiu go fer break le. aft break ish pc maa.

aft pc had trainin. straight aft. den b4 trainin started i went 2 refill water bottle den fill hao le i walk thru desports cca noticeboards de walkway under grandstand. den i was tokin 2 sum1 [fergt hu]. den suddenli gt sum1 corl my name i looked n saw yeehao. lols. he told mie he late alr cox parents went out n thus his dad cun fetch him to sku. den i was lyk :" orh hor." den i walked 2 field. den trainin started...

thruout de dae i msged wif yeehao. SOOOOO happy. my harts lyk feelin so fluttery. lols. XD durin maths he was lyk sayin im so lousy,, owaes not able tuu spot him in sku. cox he lyk OWAES spot mie. dunno y. he saed he owaes c mi since 1st 3mths. /= weirddd. hahax. den ask me wanna mit instead anot. den ask abt my dismissal tym. den i sae end at 4.3opm budden gort trainin frm 4.3o till 6.3o. den he at dat tym alr dismiss,, howeva he gt remedial at 4.3o till ard 6. den i ask whether he wan tuu wait fer mie. den in the end i end b4 him. i wait till 6.3o den he end remedial. den 2 liangshan ppl kip hangin ard. so he ask mie go home myself. cox maeb paiseh or wad. den i was sittin wif yiting n her 2 clazmate. [later gort menghan,, yimin nn jiajun] in de end b4 he left sku,, he called mie. but i nv pick up cox my fone nv on vibration. i was afraid if i on den hp will no batt. cox at dat tym left 1 bar onli. den he saw mie no respond n tot i purposeli dun wanna pick up or sumth. den he went off wif his fren...

den aft he left he msg mie sae y i nv ans fone. den i xplain n ask him y corl mie. he wanted 2 ask if i wanna go off alr. lols. den he ask if wanna eat dinner. so i was fine wif it. den he msged n sae his mum packet food fer him alr. so he eat at home 1st den later pei mie go eat dinner at jp. den half way every1 at de table i was sittin at was leavin i left wif em. den guys went off eat dinner. de gurls went hm. den i crossed the road n took 157 to jp. den i msg him 2 tell i gort on 157 at sku's bus stop. den he ask mie msg him when i reached shell station b4 i msg n tell him i on 157. so i tot he can estimate wad tym i will reach jp. so when i reach jp i msged him he sae giv him 5mins mor. lols. den i walk ard went toilet n stood at de control station[he sae wait dere]. den i received msg sayin he will b here in 2mins. lols. den at last i saw him. so we went off to jp 2 eat. i wannted 2 eat mac,, den he sae he can eat ice cream den. den eat eat eat,, chat chat chat. den left mac n went basement. he bot bubbletea. hahax. den he ordered honeydew sumth. den de lady sae :" xiao shuai ge,, mei you le. nai cha ke yi ma?" i luffed tu myself. he nv c. [gd] den he obviousli nv hear de front part. hahax. [maeb later i tell him] den we went up to 3 floor 2 walk walk. on escalator he asked if i wan 2 drink his drink. den i declined. cox i was full luhh. den walkwalk pass by arcade saw tis nood kia frm j1 of jjc. lols. he was playin wif his fren dunno wad game. den when we stop to look jux nice he go top up card. den yeehao sae wanna c how he plae. so we stood outside fer sum tym. den fer veri long dat person nv cum bac. so we left lo. carry on walkin. den he ask mie wan drink anot again. he sae he veri full. den i sae dun wan again. cox i not thirsty. lols.

den went down 2 1st floor. den dcided 2 go hm. 9+. i still in my full uniform. damn hot n i feelin super sticky. cox had trainin earlier on. [jogged ard field fer 3omins continuousli,, tuudae calfs feelin kinda sore. ):] den he pei mie go interchange weit fer my bus. aft tat bus cum he went mit his fren i guez. yarpps. so happy. dunno y. lols. nth much oso actualli. budden my hart jux feels so lite n fluttery. kekes.

reached home at 1opm. showered n msg him. den went on msn tuu chat wif a few ppl. den ard 11+ i jiu go slp le. msged gd nite 2 him n went 2 bed. plugged in my mp3 n try 2 slp. den 5 mins later,, hp vibrated. he sae nitenite n swt dreams. den i nv reply n go bac 2 slp. listen songs on mp3 till slp lo. yarpps...

`xoxo

why nott take a crazy chance ,, why nott takee a crazie dance?

lost n 4gotten,, wad m i seekinn?

2007-04-22T00:33:00.000+08:00

2dae nth much happened. quite bored. went 2 sku in de mrnin 2 help out wif the NAPFA test fer j2 guys. not ALL. dey were split up in2 grps. i took charge of o6s17. everyth went smoothly. den the fastest runner of 2.4km frm o6s17 came in 3rd fer tuudae's grp. fergot his tymin alr. hmmms. his name is jun lin i tink. i saw rodney too. not sure whether he saw mi cox i din hav tym 2 sae hie. was workin hard 2 earn my CIP hrs. hahax. (: den b4 the NAPFA test started we were kickin ball n mr leow came over n ask us wanna plae game. den i din plae cox i was wearin my N.U.M sandals. so i watched. den aft NAPFA we were shootin goals at de D-court wif street soccer goalposts. den half way dey sae lets plae a game den dunno y i look down at my feet. DEN i realised my rite BIG toe waassssss,, BLEEDIN. argggg. hurts okaes. de nail broke diagonalli in2 de flesh part. freakin pain. ther aft i limped 2 de toilet at PE porch 2 wash off de blood. i poured water on2 my toe den blood stays so i hadda lyk clean off de pain wif my finger. no1 was in de toilet den. quite gross. cox de blood look as thou its splattered out. *ewwwwww* den i went bac sat by de goalpost n watch de other gurls plae. my nail or rather my toe ish still hurtin. DAMN. sarks laa. sighs. shudnt hav plaed. damndamndamn. argggggg. hhaaax. ventin my frustrationns. pardon miee. teehees.

B4 we left sku we sat at de stage bside FIREFLY n took picspicspics. hahax. cox we were donnin our red jerseys.[ nicer dan de green 1, in my opinion X= ] den de last pic we took were of our bacs. cox gort num on jerseys. [duhhhhh~ speakin de obvious -.-] we lined in accendin order of our nums. not every1 was ard so gort missin nums here n dere luhh. hahax. den onli 3 ppl had single digits so we asked em 2 "paste" emself on2 de 'wall' of e stage. ahahas. de stage wher verbal nuggets r held on weds. will ask elaine send mie. (:

aft leavin sku we dcided 2 head 2 wm 2 eat. not every1 went. turtle,, elaine,, jingw,, jasmine,, lixuan,, tzer jing,, brenda n ME took 157 2 batok int. den brenda went off at de bus interchange. den tzer jing went off at batok mrt int. lols. fewer n fewer ppl left on de way 2 wm. we ate lunch at burger king. den finishin tym elaine's bf came 2 BK 2 look fer her. den sum of US were lyk shocked abt how her bf look lyk. [i wasnt cox i saw foto of her n her bf when i accpy her 2 dvelop fotos] den dey went off,, den turtle hadda go hm. so left mie jingwen,, lixuan n jasmine luhh. we went 2 sportslink den world of sports n comics connection was our last stop. went 2 look at shoes n stuffs. den jasmine went bot anime posters. den we went home. lixuan went 2wards mrt station so i presume she took mrt home. den mi jasmine n jingwen walk the other direction. jingw took bus at batok int n mie n jas walked 2 bus stop 2 wait fer our bus. we took 157. she alight 1st of cox. i last stop mahx. JP.

*2oapril*
din do muchh,, at nite watch roystan tan's movie. 15. de 1 kena banned in sg n de 1 wich earned him mani awards. (: i finished it ytd at last. got 1 part cant watch thou. unlez im 18 den nid 2 b youtube's mem. so i lazi sign up n fake tat im 18 yrs old. so jux skipped it. sum parts r realli touchin. overall its a gd film 2 mie. it relli shows wads goin on in gangsters' life n wad causes em 2 walk de wrong route. wad caused em 2 b led astray n stuffs. it was relli genuine. althou gt sum tuupid part. lols. XD i rate it 6.5/1o. (:

den i kip listenin 2 de poems featured in d movie. ohhh wel its not lyk i nv hear b4. i mishh de ppl whom i used 2 hung out wif. im disappearin f rm deir mind. its been ages since i saw all of em. arggggg. haven gone down batok so longg. so mani tings happened. tink nearli ALL of em ferget mie le bahhs. sighs. i guez frens CUM n GO...

`xoxo

lostt n 4gotten,, wad m i seekiin?

untiil the daee ii diie,, i will spiill my hartt ferr eiiu...

2007-04-14T22:24:00.000+08:00

longg tym nv blog alr. so shall blog again tuudae. hahax. hmmmms.

tuudae went out at 3+. cabbed tuu holland v 2 mit cheng en. cab fare : 1o bucks. actualli ish 1o.2o 1. budden de uncle nice 2 jux heck de 2ocents. hahax. actualli tot i wun hav enuff 2 pay. cox i left hse wif onli 1o bucks in my wallet. was in a rush. quikli msg cheng en 2 cum 2 taxi stand wait fer my arrival jux in case i dun hav enuff 2 pay. in e end no nid. lols. XD den cheng en go grab his lunch. he ate horfun. den aft dat we went 2 get ice cream. he chose 2 go gelare. he ate banana split again. althou diff place tis tym round. den i ate choc temp. damn swt. nided water aft eatin. cant tahan. he saed de ice cream wasnt realli gd. i wanted 2 sae :" euu choose 1 lehhx." budden din. cos watchin nba on espn. he saed i was tuu absorbed in2 de game. lols.

aft ice cream we cabbed tuu his hse at je. de condo ish 1 i was familiar wif. cox my childhood fren live across de road onli. n last tym when im at my fren's hse we will sumtyms go over 2 de condo swimmin pool fer a swim. hahax. told him tat n he was lyk :"use my facilities hurs?" lols. den went up 2 his place 2 chill n practicalli slack. toktoktok. it was 5+ when we reached i tink. den he nidda go off at 6.3opm. goin 2 his fren's dad's wake. another fren was pickin him up 2 go tgt. den i walked 2 je mrt station. msged n corl ppl c hu free 2 accpy mie go eat dinner. den went sit at de mrt station dere. until 8+. no1 free. so pathetic. felt so loneli. nas in town wif wenxian,, rika meimei in town. ryan korkor wif gf. claudius korkor at redhill. tianjie korkor goin 2 town 2 chill wif frenx. renjie korkor workin. kelvin korkor watchin movie at vivo wif camp frenx. demi mei go ahem hse. fiona jiejie go celebrate grandpa's burfdae. lex korkor at imm wif fam n relatives. at 1st chatted wif fiona jiejie on fone fer 1/2 hr. den aft tat when goin hm soon,, chatted wif lex korkor fer along tym. hahax. den went home. damn dumb. felt so UNWANTED. *sobs*

den went 2 buy sum stuffs eat den came hm le. kinda borin. lols. XD a day has passed. sighs. den now slackin. copyin sum notes fer now. chattiin too. channel 8 gort feng yun wors. cant watch. sianx. dats all fer tuudae. (:

` swirliin in a whirlpool of confussionn,,

im hidiin my fears nn braviin a faake smilee,,

2007-03-24T12:57:00.000+08:00

so mani tings happened since d start of a new sku yr. aft orientation 1 every1 started 1st 2mths+ of lessons. tough n slack. slack fer mie. wasnt realli bothered. feeliin darn guilty n pissed wif myself abt tat. tryin 2 catch up desperateli. den came postin results. i got posted tuu jj. cheers. haaaas. den my clazmates fer 1st 2mths+ either went off 2 other skus or other classes. had tuu start ALL over again. hahax. den came ogl camp. kool. great FUN. hahax. hmmmmm. was in F3. d fam colour ish green n d mascot ish teenage mutant ninja turtle wors. same as my orientation 1 de sias. such fate wif green n tmnt. lols. tmnt mmoviie cumin out le wors. ohhh,, came out le. lols. 23rd. hmmm. orientation 2 was fun. went tru thick n thin wif my fellow ogls. kekes. og14. gort jasmine mama,, suhaila,, huimin,, valerie,, eunica,, weilun n nevin. hahax. our campers startin veri attitude den aft dat oso ok le. hahax. den last dae dey gav us a surprise wors. dey gav us gifts oso. norm onli ogls giv campers gift lo. hahax.

aft orientation 2 i felt overjoyed tru n tru. mani NEW frenx i made. its so great lo. frenx everywher. wave n sae hie 2 every1. hahax. den oso wun loneli. lyk can kip goin 2 diff tables n tok. den my new claz. o7s16. [awwww,, ii mish o7s11] o7s16 gort 7 ogls. hahax. lucky gort ppl i noe. budden if dunno oso nvm. i went tru havin no close frenx at all in a new claz b4. durin 1st 2mths.in o7s11 i onli noe vivian cox she was frm my og. budden we werent close. den as tym passed d gurls were bonded tgt lo. den gort go out tgt tuu. i mishh o7s11 ppl wors. sighs. welll,, jux hadda movee on i guez. hahax. now o7s16 gort onli 6 gurls n 19 boys. xia si ren. so mani boys. unfair. Park ish d claz rep. lols. Mai ish assst.

d new claz ish still orites. kinda fun. lols. gort sum wacky ppl. hahax. gort d HORNY elwin. den nevin ,, park,, jowell. im not close 2 d gurls. owaes hung out wif d guys. cox i dunno em. lols. hmmmm. dunno wors. den skus great lols. minus d study part AS USUAL. den yay im in soccer now. quitted bball. bball ish jux not fer mie bahhx. cox i totalli dunno how 2. nv join b4 mahhx. den ms leo so fierce,, mie scared. ms lim not so fierce. im not sayin ms leo ish unkind. as in d way she speaks i scared liaos. hahax. den soccer not mani ppl cox we dun hav j2s. we r d pioneer batch. woots. hahax. its kool luhh. hahax.

im haviin trouble catchin up wif sku work le lahhx. tanks 2 myself slackin tuu muchh. lyk bac in sec sku lo. lols. XD [shud b sighin X=] hmmmm. maeb tml i will try lookin tru d NOTES le. tuudae i still wanna slack. hmmm. feel lyk goin down town walkwalk n shun bian go new urban male at heeren get sandals. lustin fer it luhh. long tym no shoppin can? walaos angelina dunno wanna buy nots. wanna swop 1 side wif her mahhx. hahax. tralala~ kinda bored now. gonna eat lunch soon. cup noodles. evenin sure kenna drag tuu swim again. damn i dun lyk swimmin larrs. nid 2 cox of my darn backbone. damn it lahhx. kaox. ):

ii wanna testiify my lurb fer eiiu,, but... im afraiid of rejectiion

2007-02-19T21:16:00.000+08:00

tuudae iish chu er. diin do muchh tuudae. went tuu ahliing jiejie hse earlii in d mrnin. her son n dotter so cute lo. esp her dotter. my dearest niiece. wahahax. miix bloods r cute. personal pref? hahax. den proceed tuu lunch at a hawker near my cousin's hse. had chicken rice fer lunch. aft lunch mi n parents go tuu NUH tuu visit my granny. until lyk 4+,, den aft tat go tuu cousin's hse liaox. at batok. oppo btviewsec. stayed dere n had dinner. den nth muchh came home le lo. jux reached home not long. at cousin xinyong's hse saw cousin yong hui n his gf serene. hahax.

tiis couple of daes bcumin blurer n dumber le. must b cox tat tym pei kelvin korkor go colleect his hp he kip hittiin my head. i wan bao chou. lols. jkjk. my twiin,, later whack him i oso sure kena. n i tink even mor. hahax. he sure tickle 1. pale cheat. bleahx. xp haiyoOs. dunno wanna go confess tuu N nots. or try wif T or G. haishhhh. confusin luhh. i owaes confused 1. haishhhhhhhh~

nowadase no1 reads my blog le. so abit heck care bout wad i write here liaos. nv post much oso. hahax. lazii bahhx. jux tryiin tuu find sum excuse. heees.

lett tat fatee cum myy way,, pls do...

2007-02-15T22:40:00.000+08:00

iits been such a long tym since i blogged. hahax. omfg lo. kekes. im bz mahhx. hmmmm. i tink ish mor of bein tuu lazi le bahx. hahax. oppppppps. X=

ytd was vdae wors. had no valentine. m single. frenlentine fer miie! cheers. (: hmmmmm. diin realli celebrate vdae or frenlentine lo. hahax. jux wentt watchh a soccer matchh. coach asked us go watch. dere were 7 of us n ms lim. our soccer tcher in charge. d match was queenswae sec against deyi sec. queenswae won! hahax. 3-1. coach was happy bahhx. his team mahx. den aft d match we ALL went 2 queenswae sc[qwsc] walkwalk. den mariya wanted 2 buy a soccer ball. dunno visited how mani shops n c how mani soccer balls lo. c till miie oso dizzy le lo.

meanwhile,, my parents r at d hospital. visitin my wai po[maternal granny]. she fell down in d toilet earliier ytd. corled d doc downstairs 2 cum up n examin. den he/she saed 2 saed my granny off 2 d hospital. den ya,, i din go visit. cos gort plans mahx. so tot i had went tuudae but din tuu.[shall touch on it later]

so aft mariya dcided wich soccer ball she wanted,, she bot it lo. den she n another soccer mate went 2 eat d laksa. i had a cup of iced tea.[1 of e recent drink addict xp ] nana ate mua ji[dunno howda spell /= ]. den turt ate luo mai gai. blahblah. den every1 left at d same tym.[caiyun went off earliier,, daddy drove her off] den d rest went out of qwcs. den nana went tak bus diff place frm us. we went tak 51/195. 51 came 1st so we took it lo. den reach queenswae mrt station. mariya din go her og dinner at je. den turt's parents were out so she dcided 2 go fer dinner wiif mariya at wm.[wm lehhx,, -.-] i had no wher 2 go so dcided 2 go tuu. no1 at hm,, parents went hospital mahx. den dad corled n asked mie tuu dine out fer dinner. yar.

den i corled kelvin korkor,, blahblah. den he saed later wanna go collect his fone at causeway. den i saed 2 mit him later lo. c i so nice pei him go. den waited at je mrt stat. d rest went on tuu board d red line. den yar went causeway wif twin korkor.[-.-] den aft dat went jp,, twin wanna buy a plush toy fer SUM1. den ask mie help him carry. i was lyk :" dun wan laa!" hahax. oppppppx. X= hmmm. den went PM eat dinner. dat tym i tink 1o le lo. lols. den reached hm 1o+. cox i live jux bside. hahax.

tuudae went sku tuu slack. hahax. ponned econs n pc tuudae. wif omost d whole claz. hahax. last wk oso. den i went town wif angeline n huihui. joelynn n vivian ps went hm n Zzz... den on d wae 2 town,, zhuang wei corled angeline n asked us wanna go bowl wif em[d bois of o7s11]. we din of cox. goin town mahx. den we went fareast shop. heees. ii bot 1 crown ring[look lyk tianjie korkor 1],, a broach[tink i spell wrongg /=]. huihui bot 2 broaches. angeline bot stuffs 2 eat. i bot 1 cup of iced tea aagain.[addicted? X=] den i wanted 2 go hospital visit wai po d lo. budden mummy corled n ask mie go hm,, sae late liaos. den i went hm lo. angeline n huihui went jp fer deir OG dinner. hahax. ya.

shall end here le. tiredd. goin sku tml.

`xoxo

lett TAT fatee cum myy way,, pls do...

iim smiiliinqq bcox of urr presencee ...

2007-01-13T11:38:00.000+08:00

sku has started,, i hav been bz. or ratherr iim lazii tuu updatte lahx. haas. i admiit kkaes? aft all hu had cum n read aniwaes? lols. XD hmmmmm. orientation was a blastt mann! absolutelii lurbb iit lotts. madee new frenx. joined 2 ccas. machiiam kiiasu. actualli ish 3. cox i applied fer jj leaders tuu. haas. tiis yr alot ppl apply so afraiid ii cannt gett iin. [[sobbs!]] iim frm og16f4 yay! hahas. den as fer civic claz iim in o7s11. siianx 1/2. mor garls den guys. supposed tuu go claz wiif em n stuffs,, butttttttt ii diin lahhx. went wiif og mates. hahas. hu cares lahs. owaes wiif angeliina n sze han. hees. jj v hiigh 1 siia. den we all jj d go bac batok sec still iin hiigh modee. lols. esp jiingwen.

lectures n lectures r wad ii hav been attendiin iin sku lahhx. eber siince aft orientation camp. evytym go LT5. hahas. mass lectures r fun. can slp wiifoutt beiin cot. nxt wk new tym table cum out den cannt siit wiif og mates liiaos. cox diff claz hav diff tym table. NO mor mass lectures. haaaiis. gort oso iish fewerr classes le. siianx.

yttd actuallii gortt bball traiinin de. iin d end dun hav cox of raiin. den seniors sae hav dinner tgt,, budden most j1s gort planns den seniors went emself. haas. beliinda saiid we r tuu run 1o rounds ard d track nxt trainin cox we din hav dinner wiif em. denn ii went bac batok sec fer d cca showcase. hahas. cheered n gort hiigh wiif fellow jjc-iians. den go fiind eugeniia meimei at d bball d booth lahx. den we walked ard tryiiin tuu fiind ppl joiin bball den cant fiind. kip walk here n dere niias. den chiicken liittle ask meii ii izzit her sista. den she said yes. dat dumb chick little beliiv. c how dumb iish batok sec's bball boiis tcher in charge. bleahx. xp he noob 1 lahhx. ahhaas.

tuudae iish satt,, guez ii will b stuckk at homme bahhs. siianx...

`xoxo

iim smiiliinqq bcox of urr presencee ...

euu r e liite tuu my pathh,, noun myyy pathh iishh all darkk...

2006-12-30T10:55:00.000+08:00

yttd cantt go outt denn ii wholee stuckk at homee siias. budden i usedd comp practiically d wholee dae. n guez wad? ii gortt nagged cox of tatt. siianx 1/2 lo. haishhh. sua. tuudae arntt gonna be anii better nahhs. suree oso stuckk at homee wholee dae 1. haishhhh. so pathetiic. sadedd le larhhs. *sobs* sku's startiin. budden tiis tym its gonna b a whole new xperiience oredii. new sku new ppl everyth's gonna b new. iits lyk startiin all over agaiin. ii dun wanna leave sec sku. i m so famiiliarr wiif d nvironmennt,, so comfortable wiif d ppl dere. [[oohhh well,, not all of cox]] im so gonna miishh sec sku. plus da fact tat my outsiide frenx oso dere mahhx. denn nxt tym hard tuu miit le bahhs. sku will b iin jurong le mahs. JURONG jc mahhs. haishhhh. wan go down niid tak bus nehhs. so mafan lahs. last tym jux walk out frm sku can liaos. den can save tym. new tym table will b how i oso dunno. hais. d niid tuu adaptt tuu d new EVERYTH makes me feel awkward n sadd...

dunno wanna dye bac haiir mahs. tiink dun wan lahx. heck care. kena cot den c how. hahas. tats mie,, TOTALLY lurbs tuu break rules regardiin sku-U. yars. hahas. tok boutt haiir,, frindge how? pierciins how?nails length how? aiyaa,, heck care lahx. hees. xp i gonna go in2 d black book as usual i guez. budden not dose type at d top of d liist 1 lahhx. i oso not SO dariin lahs. hahax. so far,, heardd tat ard 2o ppl frm bbss goiin jjc fer 1st 3 mths worrs. wonderr aft resultts r outt,, how manii will remaiin. haax. den lyk oso gort quiite alot frm myy prii sku. heex. oriientaatiion niid $$ nehx. kaox. budden i requestt use edusave. tiink gonna ask cash frm parents. den dose CASH shall b miine. iim eviil n hav lots of tricks up myy sleeves. i hav owaes been tiis wae. ahaas.

verii plaeful v loud blahblah. budden dere's anotherr siide of miie tat will surface whenn iim ard strangers. de outspoken,, dariin,, enthusiastic,, loud,, crazii garl will b replaced by a quiet n shy garl. how weiird hurs? hahas. well,, tat's jux miie. lurbb miie fer hu iim nn nott hu euu wan miie tuu b. iim hu iim m n will not changee unneccessary okaes? bleahx. xp

iim iin green team. yuckks. unglii colour fer PE tshiirt nors. i wann blackk lahx. kaoz. green n yellow zuii bu hao kan liiaos lo. siianx 1/2. siince prii sku i nv kena green siax. sianx 1/2. prii sku ii blue,, sec skuu ii red. noun green. wad luck! m so 'GLAD' siiax. -.-

hmmmm. yttd HE msged miie again. haiishhhh. rellii dunno wad he doiin lo. iim so sadd,, SO sadd ii cud cry noun. however,, on d otherr handd,, ii hadd a weiird feeliin. sumth lykk iim falliin bac fer N. y m ii everr so confuusedd. iim owaes surroundedd byy confusiions,, qns,, etc. maeb iits my pref of guys tat has caused miie so muchh harm.

ppl adviice ii folo myy hartt. BUT,, how do ii folo iit whenn ii noe iits bliind? haiishhh. iim rellii at a lostt of wad tuu do. cann ii hav a guardiian? frenx ard miie r sayiin diff tiings. omost each n every1 of em sae wad each n evy1 of em tiink.maeb cox dey r of diff age,, gender blahblah... hu shud ii listenn tuu? ii realiised ii owaes had my fake smiile on myy face. n manii other ppl do tuu. iits lyk a mask ii wear tuu hiide my sorrowful expressions,, d true xpressions dat reflect upon wad myy hartt relli feels.

`xoxo

euu r e liite tuu my pathh,, myy pathh iish no longerr liited...

lostt wiifoutt euu wiif miie...

2006-12-24T18:01:00.000+08:00

haishhh~ yy he treatt miie liidat? cannt fergett her denn dunn cum jiio miie mahhs. make mii yii xiangg qiing yuann liidat. haishhhxXx. sadedd le. noun lykk jam derr liidatt. dunno he wiil break wiif miie nots/ sae stiil lurbb miie. dunno wanna beliv mahhs. ii scaredd le worrs. haishh. tuu dae x'mas eve. so manii ppl ask miie go out. i cannt!! so sadd can? james korkor askk mii go MOS wiif hiis frenx. i cantt go. demii meiimeii ask miie go countdown wiif her n herr ahma n ahgong n maeb riika meiimeii. denn fiionaa jiejie ask miie go wiif jefrii deyy all. siianx. enjiie ytd niite oso asked miie. alll cannt go le. haishh. noun stuckk at ah ma hse worrs. rottiin le...

`xoxo

lostt wiifoutt euu wiif miie,, guiild miie wiif urr lurbb...

tell miie d truthh,, diid euu everr lurbb me..?

2006-12-12T19:06:00.000+08:00

wadds wrongg wiif miie? y do ii seem tuu owaes fall ferr d wrongg guy? lao tiian ye,, qiing bu yaoo zai zheng wo le. jiu suan wo qiu ni le. ii cant take it animor. d paiin,, d confusion. everyth. sum1 take em awae. iim dyiin. my soul wun last. dyiin in pain n sorrow. i dunno y,, agaiin n agaiin iim falliin ferr d wrong guys. guys whom nv treasure mie,, hu nv cheriish mi... guez iim jux tuu frivolous. iif tiis carries on,, i will b gonee soon. dcipated in2 d air. nv b found or reincarnated. dough my body remains,, it will b an mpty body. lyk a walkiin zombie wif no life. a lifeless form. im losiin myself. biit by biit...

der r tiings i can trust no1 fer miie tuu confine iin. i noe dat der r ppl out der williin tuu share my burden,, williing tuu ease my pain. i jux cant let go of myself. i feel as dough im gonna stop breathiin. iim fereva gaspiin fer air. perhaps nth cud heal me totalli n properli. fer i get wounds aft wounds. wounds wiich r on d recovery path split open again n again,, 1 by 1. wo yi jing pian ti ling shang le. shui jiu de liao wo? shui jiu de dao wo? d world is spiiniin ard mie...

my dae ish so blue. i dun feel so,, but it is. maeb im tuu numb tuu feel dat it is falliin apart. it was nv whole. it owaes fall apart wheneva iit was goiin tuu b complete. haishhh... liife ishh sadd ferr miie. iim 16,, but do i noe wad im doin? wher im headin? i stil shed tears,, but dey r of meanin. i dun shed em easily now. tings r owaes changiin. so r ppl. nth stays as tym passes. nth ever remains d same. when can i get hold of myself? guez i will nv get d chance fer im constantli losin grip of myself. i hav given up...

`xoxo

tell miie d truthh,, diid euu everr lurrb mie..?

iim losiin myyself,, wiill sum1 reviivee miie..?

2006-12-11T11:53:00.000+08:00

havv ii fergottenn euu? n movedd onn jux lykk euu diid ages ago? or m ii jux lyiin tuu myselff? y m ii fereva so confusedd. derr r so muchh ii can sharee tuu no1. afraiid datt iit maee leak outt tuu d wrong personn. i feel as dough im safocatiin. ii m losiin myselff. hu cann help miie? hu cann sharee myy burdenn? been stress lately,, guez no1 noes. ii owaes bottle uppp my feeliins as usual...

`xoxo

iim losiin myyself,, wiilll sum1 reviivee miie..?

lett miee stayy iin urr mbracee ferevaa nn ii wiil nv leavee eiiu...

2006-12-07T21:58:00.000+08:00

tuudaee vvvv tiiredd. cox ytd niite tonn. denn horrs ii nv slp att all lahhx. -___-zzZ

den prev niite oso ton lahhx. cox wentt MOS wiif ryann korkor,, niickyy,, weii wenn,, yiingyiing,, liily,, a garll ii dunno d namee 1. shortt n errmmm,, howw do ii putt iit? stoutt? opppps. X= cantt fiind a better wordd lahhx. hahas. denn wentt MOS noe 1 garl,, angeliia,, yiingyiing noee d. buut ferr nott longg. denn gortt 1 grp of guys. frm tangliin sec d,, sec 4 tuu. wee miingleed wiif em denn fren fwenx liiaox lo. denn weii wenn go derr paii swee liiddat. nv groove tuu d musiic AT ALL. -___- denn he saee watchh ppl dancee niicer. hahas. denn me n jonathan stood b4 d speakers n bases n chat viia typiin iin hp. tuu noisyy,, shoutt oso cantt hearr lahhx. i was lyk wtf. lolx. denn stood derr siibeii longg okaes? denn aft v longg cannt tahann liiaos. go upstaiirs fiind wei wenn n kenny. deyy siitiin at d VIP/ reserved seats. denn we go siit derr oso. denn jonathan kept screamiin. cox tryiin tuu unblk earrs. earrs machiiam kenna blk lo. hear soundd all soft siiax. denn later oon bcamee hearr "eeeeee..." sounds lahhx. -___-

denn awhiile niid leave le cox ryann korkor gort werkk later iin d mrniin mahhx. denn horx niickyy,, weiiwenn,, ryann korkor nn mii wentt off lo. denn we reachh batok 163[ryann korkor d blk]. denn siit derr plann outt d 'to-dos'. niickyy saee he go ryann korkor hse slpp tiil ryann korkor go work denn he go hm. denn all okok liiaox. leftt miie. ii cant go hm lahx. cox ii told parennts ii wentt chalett. denn ryann korkor bo biian peii miie. weii wenn oso stayyed,, samee ferr niickyy. denn laterr onn siimonn didii came tuu.

denn wentt cheers eatt cup noodle. ii eat chiili crab d. d niissiin 1. denn ryann korkor oso eat chiilii crab d. ii nv korpii okaes? ii lyk dat flavourr tuu. hmmmm. den fiinishhed le lykk stiil hunggry. denn ii sae out. haas, den aft a shortt whiile,, weiiwenn ask mii helpp hiim buyy green tea denn he sae buyy myselff anottherr cup of cupnoodles. he den passed miie $5. *tankss ferr d treatt oohhh weiiwenn.((:*

yttd niite not manii ppl tonned. sum halfwae wentt home. ryann korkor,, daltonn nn amberr.
denn miie nn simonn didi gort go plae agaiin lykk last tym. damnn farniie cann? LOLX! XD denn tat tym weiiwenn nn jasonn wentt bac 113 tuu fiind yongkangg n co. den siimonn diidii slp damn longg. ii cant slp cox he slp mahx. later gort robbers or thiiefs how? haas.

ii mrniin 9am+ den go hm. cum hm use comp awhiile denn go showerr cox miittin demii meiimeii. ii havenn slpp siiax. noun goiin slp liiaox..! XP

`xoxo

lett mii sttay iin urr mbracee ferevaa nn ii wiilll nv leavee eiiu...

drownniin iin myy ownn tearrs,, saddnez overrwhelmms miie...

2006-12-04T23:35:00.000+08:00

tuudaee nv go outt iin d mrniin.. mrniin wakke upp 11 liiaox. den watchh tv. den eatt breakfaz. den aft tat laoma wentt tuu buyy lunchh. denn eat n watchh tv.

denn kaiyan[cherii] msgedd askk tuu go iinterrviiew at suntec. dunno wad boutiq. denn aftnn go lorx.den aft go fiil d formm we walkedd ard suntec. look look c c. haas. denn takke mrt go hm liiaox. i nv go hm la. kaiyann no wherr go so go hm. she corl sheryl she at plaza sing wiif herr laogongg. denn kaiiyann sae lykk wiil xtra so diin go fiind em. ii machiiam pang sehh her siiax. feltt badd. butt ii was niice enuff tuu go all d wae tuu suntec wiif herr kkaes? wahhaaas. XD

denn shee wennt hm as derr wasnt aniwherr tuu go or anii1 ferr her tuu miit upp wiif. denn at je mrt station ii alighted n wentt over tuu d north southh liine. go batok.

frm batokk iint walkkiin go mac,, fionna jiejie n siimon didi deyy all derr. denn onn d wae ii saww demii meiimeii nn riika meiimeii.
deyy at cc oppo d plaegrd plae d riing tiing. de can turn 1. machiamm merry go round. but nott. haas. denn ii wentt plaee wiif em tiil demii meiimeii niid go hm. denn riika meiimeii askk demii meiimeii sendd herr tuu baatokk int. denn actualli aftnn demii meiimeii shudd corl mii n ask mii go outt wiif em 1. budden shee diin. shee duaa mii siiax. bleahx. sobbs. ))':

denn we wentt seperatee waes. ii go mac.

denn nv c jiejie n didi. so went toilett. denn cum outt deyy stiil havenn cum backk. denn ii wentt outt bby bacc door. go wantiing mama's bubbleteaa shopp buyy bubbletea. denn saw em. denn dey cum bubbletea shopp tuu. gortt jiejie n didi n jeremyy n weii en. denn d boiis bott bubbletea oso. denn jiiu go mac liiaos. smokiin area gort jiiefu[jef] n ryann korkor n jac[eddy's stead]. denn siit down cox jiefu n jiejie n jac went 14o sell d xmas card tuu dunno hu. denn aft awhile deyy cum bac le.

aft sum tym xiangxing korkor n saozi[mernel] came. ddenn blahblah. tiiredd liiaox. dun wann type le. ahaas. xp

tml niite tonn wiif jiejie,, didi shudd b gortt ton tuu. whhhheeeee. no niid rot at hm. wahaaas. frii goiin buyy comp tablee wiif laopa. laopa signn broadband $62/mth 1. den gortt free desktop. yayyyy! so happie. buddenn 15dec den cumm. haishhhh. nxt wk. ii at chalett summor. cumm bac frm chalet den can uz. haishhh.

`xoxo

drownniin iin myy ownn tearrs,, saddnez ishh overrwhelmmiin miie...

soundd orff myy dreamm,,,

2006-12-03T22:48:00.000+08:00

whhheeeeeee,, lonqq tymm nvv blogg liiaos. kekes. kelviin korkor stiilll saee me. bleahx. tuupiid nahhs. miie lazii cant arx? wahhaas. jkjk. lata euu mrniin giib mii mrniin corl ii diie. ahaas.

hmmmm. tuudaee wokee upp at 11+. damnn tiiredd. cox ytdd 2+am denn slpp mahx. haas. watch d wang feii hongg,, denn watchh aniime. on channell u.

wakee upp le watchh tv oso. denn nth niice tuu watchh liiaos. ii watchh initial d. d anime 1,, not d moviie. denn aftt dat usee compp. denn showerr denn go ahma hse liiaos.

go ahma hse nthh tuu do. darnn siianx. so borrowedd cousiin's laptopp tuu use. denn ii use tiill no batt cox i plug iin myy hp tuu transferr pix den hp plugged iin wiil b chargedd by d laptop mahx,, summorr ii liistenn songgs. confiirm fast no batt. ii usedd quiite longg oso. feww hrs. haas. opppps. x= denn nounn cum hm le lors. siianx. nthh tuu do 1. haishhhh.

hmmmmmm. fionna jiejie askk mii ton nxt tues n wed,, she gortt chalett dunn wanna go. haas. jiiefu shudd b gort peii her bahhx. lata i xtraa how ars? oo-ouu. //= shall c how iit goes.

mrniin xiangxiingg korkor msged tuu sae he changee num. den sae :" meii, tiis ishh korkor... blahblah." den i ask hiim hu iish iit. denn he repliied :" xiiangxiing lahx..." machiiam xpectt mii tuu noe siiax. as iif i onlii gortt 1 kor cann? guo fenn. humphh. okaes. nvm. ii nott datt xiiaoqii 1. ii yuann liiang hiim. da renn you da liiang. bleahs. xp

kelviin korkor,, ii updatte liiaox le hors!! bleahx. xpPpPPpPpppPpPpPpp

`xoxo

eiiu aree d keyy tuu myy hartt...

2006-11-21T11:46:00.000+08:00

recentt fotos...((:

whenn haiir stiil blackk...

yy eiiu havdaa go..?iim brokkenn...

2006-11-20T22:31:00.000+08:00

tuudaee wokke upp latee. denn eatt lunchh. aft tatt swiitchh onn d tellyv denn watchh sum cartoon. haas. mii zhangg buu daa. bleahx. xp ii chiildd att hartt mahhx. cannt ars? -___- mii siiao liiaox. //= denn watchh iiniitiiall D,, d cartoon versiion. nott d moviie. denn awhiile ii go showerr,, cox wann go downn batokk. nthh tuu do,, pluss pass demii meiimeii herr wallett.

showerr liiaos denn go outt. raiin worrx. budden lazzi takk umbrellaa. nvthelez jux go lorrs. denn go tiil int msgg meii askk herr wherr denn askk herr batokk gortt raiin mahhx. denn shee saee oso heavyy lykk at bl iint derr. so ii jux take mrtt. actualii intennd tuu go lot1 findd fionna jiejiee budden endded upp goiin batokk. dunno y. denn on d wae,, msged riika meiimeii ask herr shee at wherr. shee sae she goiin fiindd demii meiimei att 183. den ii askk herr wann go 2gt. cox mii gonna findd demii meiimeii oso. den she sae miit at cheers. denn laterr whenn ii walkkiin frmm wm tuu cheers derr riikaa meiimeii msgedd nn saee go mac. shee miit eugenee awhiile. den ii saedd okays n wentt derr. reachhed ler saw herr wiil eugene deyy all lo. denn shee leftt wifi mii,, eugeene jk sae shee pang sehh...

riika meiimeii nn wantiing meiimeii gonna transferr sku. frmm fhss tuu swiisscott. denn raiin heaviily. budden we heckk caree X-ed d roadd overr tuu 186 derr. denn searchh ferr ourr wayy tuu 183. denn wee walkk n walkk nn tok nn tokk boutt lastt thurs niite d tiings. denn wee reachhed 187 shee satt downn at d stonee tablee at d voiid deck. denn shee corl yongfaa diidii askk hiim n d rez tuu cum overr 187 iinsteadd. denn deyy saee deyy at 193 askk us go overr. denn riikaa meii jux sat derr cox she hungryy liiaox. wanna eatt herr chiicken winggs. den vvv longg later den we walkk overr. bsiide niia...

reachhed lerr derr gortt demii meiimeii,,yong faa diidii,,siimonn,,jefrii nn demii's cousiin. jac. den we stannd att d siide. nortt muchh spacee tuu siit lo. denn yong faa diidii tuudae v guaii autto corll mii jiejie. lols. denn aftt summ tymm yong faa diidii fall downn worrs. backk fliip nehhx. denn "kongg!!" v loud,, hiis headd hiit d groundd. denn evy1 luff. he so keliian. confirmm paiin 1. budden iish lykk siibeii farniie lo. denn he satt derr saee v paiin lykk small boiboi. haas. denn daltonn,,yiiliangg nn xx korkor camee. denn daltonn wentt dyee haiir earliier on. d frontt lite bluee siiax. hiis fringee. machiiam fakee haiir worrs. x= denn xx korkor machiiamm actt nv c. denn mii oso nv do anithh lo. denn mernell camee. denn aftt sum whiile 2 garls came. 1 c b4 at batok centrall,, d other 1 dunno hu. heardd mernell corll herr jiejie. denn sum tym laterr demii meiimeii n herr cousiin go hm liiaos. denn aftt sum whiile riika meiimeii askk mii wann go liiaox mahhx. denn ii askk herr peii mii go wm,, ii wanna buyy shoes mahhs. denn wee wennt 1o9 derr d bus stopp takk 941. denn go m buyy shoes. shee saee datt tym orbb shoes niice,, shee oso wanna buyy. kekes. denn aft buyyiin we wennt mos burgerr buyy driink. ii thirstty mahhx. denn shee saee : " waaaas. 1.95 bucks,, so ex. " denn saee ii riichh. ii nott. denn shee saee treatt herr driink denn ii saee halff. denn shee saee okaes. ii paiid $o.95 iin d endd. lolx. denn shee saee wanna eatt old changg kee. denn we wennt downn basementt buyy tiing. denn shee treatt mii sotongg on stiickk. denn she buyy sotongg balls osh0o0o. denn wee wentt upp 1st floor,, she wentt iintu d shopp bsiide coffee bean,, nott tiis fashiion iish d other siide 1. denn go iintu 1 jeweleryy shoop. ii tot wad shee wanna c,, denn iish shee usee d miiror. -___- denn we wentt iin another boutique nn look ard. shee dropp 1 piiece orbb top. ehhh. nono. iish omostt droppp. denn ii luff luff. denn shee askk mii dunn luff. hahas. denn wentt m1. denn shee look at fonees. denn we wennt takke mrtt home liiaox...

denn whenn att bl iint liiaox ii walkkiin tuu d 193 bus queue. denn gortt 1 bigg grpp of guyys walkk pass. denn dunno shouut sii mii lann denn ii turnn look denn turnn backk scareed deyy saee see wadd see. denn ii conttinue walkiin lo. denn ii heardd sum 1 saeed xcuse mii denn ii turnn bsiide denn saww 1 botakk guyy. denn he stood b4 mii nn saee hiis frenn wann myy num. denn he pt bhiind. denn dunno y i sae dunn wann. denn he saee dun wann nvm denn walkk awayy. machiiam poliite sehhx. lols. XD

denn reachhed hm liiaos ard 7+pm...

`xoxo

yy eiiu havdaa go..? iim trully brokenn...

iim losiin myy sannityy biit byy bitt...

2006-11-19T23:05:00.000+08:00

tuudaee wokee upp att 8am+,,denn c stiil earlii denn go backk slpp. den at 1o+am wokee upp agaiin,, denn c stiil earlii so go slpp agaiin. lols. XD at 11am+ den wokee upp. denn demii meiimeii corll mii or ii corll herr bahs.. tokk a whiile den ii go washh upp,, brushh teeth etc. denn wentt tuu showerr. so tiiredd. cox ytd niite slptt att 2am+ or 3am liidat worrs. hmmmm. denn aft showerr demii meiimeii corled agaiin. denn wee saee miit wherr lorrs. den i gortt readdy tuu go outt. denn reachh outsiide skuu d busstopp iit pourred heaviily n ii keptt cursiin underr myy breathh. lols. corlled meii denn shee saee shee cumm d busstopp ii waas att tuu miit mii. so0o0o,, ii waitedd. denn shee laterr corled n saedd ggo oppo d busstop waiit ferr herr,, shee takiin 941 frm iint. so ii waited n waited n waitedd. shee wass on d 3rdd 941 den passed d bus stop ii waas att. lols. iit wass indeed a longggg waiit. mann!! ii hadd patiience,, no worriies. haas. xp denn we wentt buyy bubbleteaa att wantiing meiimeii d mama d shopp. den wentt siit att mac. c all middle agee d ppl denn we dciided tuu ggo else wherr. iit feltt kiindaa weiird siittiin iin derr lohhs. soo.. yar,,wentt off tuu sumwherr ellse. haas. we dciided tuu go 1o6. wee walkedd derr. denn satt downn,, gortt sum oldd ahh pekk siit nearrby plaee chess. deyy on d dunno wadd musiic,, machiiam operaa d songg lahhs. sum partts verii squeekyy n weiirdd. denn we att derr startt ourr ziiliian-iin. dunno meii bcum morr nn morr ziiliiann cox orff myy iinfluencee. wahhaaas. iim iinocennt evenn iif iim nott. dunn caree. bleahs. xp hmmmm. denn aftt tatt wanna go wm buyy sneakkers. budden meii niid miit alsonn. denn wee waiit lohh. he eatt damnn longg. waiit super longg. denn wentt 112 derr d playgrd d swiing tuu waiit. denn vvvvvvv long laterr saww 1 small figuree iin whiite topp. denn meii askk mii izzitt alsonn. denn ii sae c small small d,,shudd b bahhx. lols. oppppps. x= denn corll hiim ask hiim wherr hee askk mii hu. denn sae he walkkiin tuu 112. den aftt tatt he corlled meii askk herr go dunno wherr. denn meii msgedd mii askk mii go wm waiit her. den ii walkk tuu wm. halfwayy,, meii corled nn saee herr wallet wiif mii. iin myy bagg. denn ii saee at niite ii cum backk batokk denn pass herr backk. cox shee askk mii putt iit iin myy bagg earliier onn. denn ii wentt takk mrtt tuu lakesiide. go siir diin's hse. sec4s werr all iinviitedd. denn deyy met at lakkesiide at 2pm. so0o,, ii wentt alonee laterr. denn att derr satt downn chatt wifi d others iin siir din's rm. denn saww turtlle nn mariiya dyeed deiir haiir tuu. denn mariiyaa d froont gortt yii tiiao yii tiiao d redd 1. lykk myy colourr. att ardd eveniin 5pm+ we leftt. onlii sureshh,,joehann nn marcus stayyed. mariiya wentt tuu miit herr papa. wanyu nn cheryyl wentt hm. denn turtlle n noii wentt hm oso. denn mii bananaa n theiif wentt cozwae.walkk herre nn derr denn wentt iin conversee,,ii wann buyy shoes mahhs. denn dunn habb ii wann d siize. sadded. so diin buyy lo. aftt summor walkkiin we took mrt bac. theiif aliightedd at gombakk. denn ii alightted at batokk. banana wanntedd tuu go liibrary att je. shee den took mrt derr lo. denn i corled demii meiimeii askk herr cann cum downn tuu her hse d voiid deckk nots den shee saee 8.3opm.. iit wass 8pm liidat whenn ii corlled herr. denn ii saee so latee soo saee tmll denn returnn herr. denn walkked tuu ah ma hse. nearlli derr liiaos,, suddenlii heavyy downn pourr. ii was lykk stunned. sortta. not exactlii oso. lols. XD denn corlled my ah yii tuu corl myy laoma ans d fonee. denn iit wass superr heavyy,, d raiin ii meant. haas. denn waiit at bus stop ferr myy laoma briing umbrella downn. denn myy laoma havenn cumm d raiin crease liiaos. -___- wantted tuu walkk tuu ahma hse budden ahyii corled nn askk me dunn go aniwherr cox miee laoma cum downn liiaos. so ii waitedd lorrx. denn awhiile laterr myy mom camee. denn d raiin totallii stopp liiao lorrs. dotx. den wentt ahma hsee...

`xoxo

iim losiin myy saniityy biit bby bitt...

savee mii frrm d darkneez datt iish nverlopiin mii...

2006-11-18T22:26:00.000+08:00

olvls overr liiaos. fuckiin harpiie boutt iit cann? wahhaaass. ><><>

tiis iishh wadd ii hearr,, iim hiiddiin frmm myy feearrs...

2006-11-15T17:32:00.000+08:00

tuudaee hadd phyy paperr. iit was quiite oriite. wunn saee iits a breezee buut iit was easiier dann preliims. well iits owaess d casee riites? haas. so tiired nounn. aft paperrs tuudaee wentt tuu jp wiif zt n joa. walkkwallk. c tiings den joa bot naiil poliish. hmmm. promm cumiin mahhs. niid looklook seesee tiings. kekes. nxt frii nehhs. *screamms* iits soo nearr liiao lahhx. hmmm. tml lastt dae of olvl. yippeeee. aftt papers go hm changee denn go plae arcadee wiif sariina den maeb aft tat go findd fionna jiejie. shee 1opm xiia bann. dunno cann anoot. dunno tml niid wad tymm cumm hm. surre earlii 1. haiishhhh. olvl overr stiil no diff 1. pathetiic nahhs. bleahs. ><>

`xoxo

surppresiin d memoriies frmm playyiin iin myy miindd...

d memoriies r driiviin mii iinsanne...

2006-11-13T13:08:00.000+08:00

iits kiinda scaryy tatt sum1 wriite sum msg tuu euu at fwensterr. he sae wad wanna spendd tymm nn $$ onn euu. denn askk euu gibb hiim urr numm. lykk wanna conn euu liidatt. euu noe,, dosee rape cases nn stuuffs wiich hab beenn goiin onn lyk ferevva. nv savee. ii giiv ppl myy numm. buut datt personn saee dosee tiings sortta makke mii freaked outt. okaes,, maeb nott tuu tatt xtennt. butt iit gavv mii a freakkiish feelliin. lykk sumthh's fiishy summwherr nn stuffs. *shiiverrs* [brrrrrr..!] oohhhh. gortt ppl sae ii prettii. -___- im totalli not pretti. jux avg. pls. onlii avgg. tatts all. -____- haas. so0o0o siianx. havenn eatt myy lunchh. tiink iit gortt coldd oredii. tiis typpe weatherr sure d. haas. niice tuu slpp nehhs. haas. haiishhhh. feww morr daees tuu endd orbb d tuuuupiiid olvl llerrs. haas. yiipeeee! soo harpiiie lohh. thurrs dat g.bushh cummiin sg den sum roads blk upp denn olvl 1st paperr tatt daee pushh bacc tuu 9am iinstead. bleahhs. so toa paii. bo biian he BIGG
mahhs. dunno wiill endd latee nots. mii aftt paperrs tatt daae wanna go downn lot1 findd jiejie d. eatt dinner wiif herr. longg tymm no c herr lers. noun shee werkk liiaos. dunno wenn cann go outt 2gtt lohhs. haiishhhh. denn mii oso lukkiin ferr jobb. niid $$ mahhs. bo biian. haas. ><

d memoriies r driiviinn mii iinsanne...

unnablle tuu movve onn,, hanggiin ontuu d paaz...

2006-11-12T14:00:00.000+08:00

d endd tuu d tiiresumm olvl ishh quiietlii iinchhiin nearrer n neearrer. soonn ii will b freed frm tormennts i fellt frmm dosee bks. damnn em. burnn em. destroyy em. ripp em apartt. haas. crazii liiaox. ahaas. >< skku =" lez">

rmberiin d tymm whenn i wntt tuu miit E n J afft myy lastt papperr ferr myy preliims... we took 178 at d bus stopp aftt polyycliinic. truout d buss journneyy,, i hadd myy headd onn hiis shoulderr nn ii restedd onn hiis shoulderr. at tat tymm iit waas as iif d worldd belongedd tuu us onlii. he meannt d worldd tuu mii.. naviie tiinkiin,, wiishfull tiinkiin.): ii was nthh tuu hiim. everr.. E's arm waas all redd as ii wass leanniin onn iit. he jokedd tuu J tatt he's gortt a neww angg gong. lols. aftt E n J gortt off att E's hsee derr ii wentt hm alonne.

d 1stt tymm ii huggedd hiim i fellt aas doughh myy hartt melltedd n evenn evaporatedd. iit was bcox ii rann awayy frm mac coxx he wannted tuu plaee my voiicemaiil outt loudd. denn myy voiicemaiil iish ii singg songgg lahhs. v ps can? lols. ><>

ii jux wanna noee sumthh. nn ii wanna noee iit reall badd.. ferr a longg tymm ii havve beenn ponnderriin overr iit,, overr nn ovver agaiinn... we werr 2gtt iin d bginniin coxx orff a motiive,, butt alongg d wayy,, didd dose fakee feelliins bcumm genuiinee? orr truoutt dat 2mthhs,, evythh EVERYTHING waas fakke? d storyy iish leftt wiffoutt ann enddiin.. nno closuure tuu iit...

tuu euu,, iit miite b a pastt.. evenn a fergorttenn pastt wiich euu erased awayy longg agoo.
tuu mii,, iit wiilll owaees remaiin an unfiniishedd chapterr orff a bk boutt us...

`xoxo`

myy harrt iishh lockked nn d keyy tuu iit ishh thrownn awayy byy eiiu...

derrr's tuu muchh tymm cannott errasee...

2006-11-11T18:31:00.000+08:00

soOoOo siianx nounn. juxx gortt off d fonne wiif demii meiimeii. shee at kiife's frenn d dunno bbq or wadd. walann ehh kiife nn hiis prii skku clazmatte tyokk machiiam loudspeakker. lykk wann wholee worlld noe wadd deyy tokiin boutt siiax. yttd niite my laopaa suddennlii saee iif ii wanna smokke he wiill teachh mii how. ii jiitaoo sehh diiao. wondderr yy he suddenlli sae tatt. makee mii blurr lohh. denn saee iif ii wanna dyye haiir he wiil payy ferr iit. wwhhhhhheeeeeee. soOoOo harpiiie......!!((:

ii havv beenn all alonne all alongg...

complette myy worldd wibb uur lurbb...

2006-11-08T20:12:00.000+08:00

iim deadd. nnv b reviivedd i guessed.. nounn xx sae he nortt myy fwenn lers. feww daees
aggo stiil saee okaes bb myy korkor agaiinn. dunno wadd he tiinkiin. haiish. dunno ler lahs. den ytd riika saee she gortt banned frm batokk. denn ii asked herr y nn hhu bann herr,, shhe sae :" aiiyaas, long storyy luhhs." machiiam vv angryy. haiish. mm ii tuu nosyy orr wadd nehhx? haiishhh. saddeddd lohh. )): examms endiin le. budden lykk v siianx nehhs. nortt muchh pllans. so0o0o siianx. wanna diie le. ytdd vvvvv downn worx. )))): den slpt earlii. tuudae gort eng paperrs summor. d paperrs werr stiil oriitee.((: buut tiink ii wunn b farriin tuu well ferr iit worrx. ): fionna jiejie gonna werkk at lot1 llers. go diisiiao herr? lykk vv bad worrx. duun wann. mii b gdd meiimeii. kekes. gonna go outt wiif demii meiimeii,,eugeniia meiimeii nn berrliinda aftt mii holiis. hees. waiitiin oohhhh. hoppe wiil havv summ farnn bahhs. havenn had anii funn ferr vvvv longg le wors. )): pathetiic. haas. olvl d fault lo. haas. XD d nite b4 d dreamm ii wiish iish reall d. buut iish 1oo% iimpossiblle llo. confiirmm guaranttee pllus chopp nn $$ bac worrx!! (X hoope cann rmbb iit. kiip iit iin my memos. haiish. liife ishh sadd. liife iish paiinfull. tiis BIG paiinfull worldd. ))X

takke mme hiighh upp wiif uur lurbb,, uur lurbb iish soOo uppliiftiin...

2006-11-08T17:20:00.000+08:00

startiin a neww blogg herre lle worrx. haas. ><